Desperation, Longing and Desires (part V)

PART V: CONSIDERING REALITY

Of course, upon coming to see you,
I could wear a suit, a tie,
gel my hair, cut my nails,
shave my face, wash my ears
and smear myself in some potent perfume
and accordingly appear as a human
a true being like I see in London
when it is early in the morning
and I am on my way to euphoria
but for what would I want to be one of them?
Another black jacket in the office
Another desolate newspaper on the tube
Another lost and lonely wife
Another pair of smart, expensive shoes in Canary Wharf.

I want to be a little puppy
and lick you all over
from chirpy morn to ecstatic eve
I may wear a waistcoat
but nothing else with it
and I may wear the eyes,
the nose and classic features
of a human being
like the ones on T.V.
but shall indulge in no useless expectations
as awakening in the early morn
showering and greeting a dark dawn
just to sit at a screen
picturing bliss at a great lake’s side
and riding home to dull television again
another pack of cigarettes down
In fact what I shall wish to do
is live life in rebellious reverse
and say nothing to the elders
or the government
and leave them unable to touch me
so, when I am tired, I shall walk
until the bewilderment of sleeplessness
greets me again
and, when I am hungry, I shall swim at sea
and let the fish tuck into me,
my expired skin,
and come back home as a pile of bones.
This is when I shall greet you
for there is no use in seeing me now
holding a telephone
(that never rings):
You wait, my dearest,
until my wig is off and make-up done
and I am unclothed beneath only the darkest of eyes
and I welcome the winter skies
to gather above me
oh! Picture the relevance of all these worldly tragedies
we now see before us
and how useless they will be
and fuck the news!
I needn’t know who has died
or what the elections say:
I should wish only for a darker night
than the last
so as we are covered
blind and invisible
to make our perfect escape.