BATTER ME ONE OF THEY MARS BARS

The Scots seem to hold their diet in high regard
Where against heart attacks they should guard
Food from the frying pan greasy and charred
Forever eating deep fried Mars by the yard
With saturated fats turning their arteries hard
Indigestible fodder their ulcers they bombard
So what spread do they hold in such fond regard
What do they put on bread something avant-garde?
It's a simple enough question it's not that hard
I think I would say "I cant believe its not lard"