I WANT IT ALL
You can't have everything
That’s true enough id say
And if you did have everything
Where would you put it anyway?
FRIEND OR FOE
Your friends may come
And your friends may go
But your enemies just
Seem to accumulate so
NOBODY LIKES A SMART ARSE
Death is I would say
Just simply God's way
Of telling you or I
Not to be such a wise guy
BANG YOUR DEAD
A nuclear war, can they say
Ruin your whole bloody day
For in any atomic hostility
All men are cremated equally
CARRY A LIGHT
When you think about it
A flashlight actually is
Nothing more than a case
For holding dead batteries
BARKED
The shinbone is nothing more
I would I think, dare to remark
Than a simple device for finding
Pieces of furniture in the dark
RAT RACE
Over time Science has
Provided us with a number of facts
They recently discovered
That research causes cancer in rats
POVERTY TRAP
I think the simplest way of defining Poverty
Is when you have too much month left, you see
When you have come to the end of the money
HERE ENDETH THE FIRST LESSON
I think war is probably God's way
Of teaching us all a lesson I’d say
But it won’t be a lesson in theology
Its more likely a to be in geography
IF AT FIRST, AGAIN
Robert the Bruce once decreed
While he was in a cave to hide
That if at first you don't succeed
Destroy any evidence you tried
