SIMPLY AMUSING part 2


from the ABC set JUST FOR LAUGHS

DOUBLE YOUR MONEY

The quickest way to double
Your money lets not forget
Is to fold it in half and then
Put it back in your pocket

NEVER DO TODAY

You have decided
To procrastinate
But never got round to it
Not yet at any rate

RHETORICAL EYE RESTING

There is a rhetorical question
That gives me indigestion
Why is it when we're dog tired chaps
We take what are called catnaps?

SLIDING OUT OF CHILDHOOD

The first sign of childhood ending
That you can remember so far
When you are too tall to be allowed
On the slide at the burger bar

PLAYING FOOTSIE

He was not the brightest bloke
And he thought its fair to say
That The FTSE one hundred
Was some kind of foreplay

IT HAS EMERGED

I was told that Motorola
Is going to merge with Enron
They will form a new company
Which they plan to call moron

POPE EYE

When the pope
Went to mount olive
Popeye found out
And found it hard to forgive

THE X FACTOR

To define an expert
Ex is the unknown factor
And a spurt is a drip
Under pressure

YOU’LL LIKE THIS

My uncle Henry is a magician
And he’s also an undertaker
If you saw his act you’d know
Because he says Abra Cadaver

DON’T LOSE YOUR HEAD

If you can keep your head when
All about you in your location
Other people are losing theirs
Maybe you misread the situation

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