DON’T PANIC
There's no panic quite so reel
Like panic you momentarily feel
Scaring yourself by getting
A body part stuck in something
ON THE TREAD MILL
The worst part of participating in
The rat race is that even if you win
You’re still only a rat, which is a sin
OH BOY
What you will actually see
When that irritating putz
The Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over
Are his Doughnuts
LAWS OF THE UNIVERSE # 9
There is a law of equality
Which is concerned with probability
Namely a given events occurrence
Is inversely proportional to desirability
NEW ANTHEM AHEM
Cuba should have a new national anthem
I know what gets my vote
The new Cuban National Anthem
"Row, Row, Row Your Boat"
SHORT HOLIDAY
When certain families
Go on their holidays
They don’t go very far
Just to a different bar
MICKEY ME OLD CHINA
The reason there is no Disneyland
In China
No one's tall enough
To go on the rollercoaster
LOST WALK
Two hydrogen atoms were walking along
One said, 'I think I've lost an electron.'
'Are you sure?' was the others interrogative
The first said, 'Oh Yes, I'm positive... '
LOCAL INQUIRY
I rang up my local swimming baths
Asking 'Is that the local swimming baths?'
The reply he received was quite rum
'It depends where you're calling from.'"
BUILDING ENQUIRY
I rang up a local building company
With an enquiry like you do
'I want a skip outside my house.'
He said 'well I'm not stopping you.'
