Just how far should a man go for a mango?
I’ve never been quite sure.
Will tangerines trip lightly in a tango
Before they get too sore?
I cheer those cheeky cherries on a Chewsday
And never ask for more.
Five fruit a day will chase away my bluesday
But melons are a bore.
A passion fruit will make a perfect puree,
A taste that I adore;
Bananas beat the bodhran for a bourée,
I’m saying what I saw;
A kiwi cannot kiss a careless cowgirl,
Of that we can be sure,
But this I tell you true and tell you now, girl:
Fresh melons are a bore.
Papaya pleases perfectly the palette
And feeds the hungry poor;
A coconut surrenders to a mallet,
But ends up on the floor;
A gooseberry can gauge the grandest gantry
With gallantry galore,
But one fruit will just fester in my pantry:
Those melons I abhor.