I love the texture of cotton-balls,
And the way they simply hold form.
Their weaving material locks in itself,
So strongly it could probably withstand a storm.
A storm shall blow – as it always does –
And carry the cotton-ball away from me,
And I'll watch that dandelion float away.
I love them so much I'll just let it fly free.
She hates the texture of cotton-balls,
And the way their material coils;
It reminds her of those scary days,
The ones which held the most turmoil:
Her father would take a lovely cotton-ball,
And dab away her cuts,
But even with its priceless aid,
Those dabs were never enough.
In bed we lay tonight,
Her eyelids like shields,
Blocking my soul
From entering hers.
My arm wrapped over her arm,
I watch her a great deal,
Listening to her heart speak; reminisce
About the day:
She loves my touch
She loves my smile
She loves the fact I'll stay for a while
She loves my name
She loves my hospitality
She'll thank me when she wakes
For stealing her from reality.
When she comes to, I'll calmly say,
“I love your touch, I adore your smile,
I wouldn't mind spending forever with you.
I love your many names; I respect your old lifestyle,
And maybe one day I can teach you to love cotton-balls, too.”
Comments
Stan | July 13, 2012 - 19:35
Great, Jess. I love it. And I love cotton-balls!
I like the way you change form in each stanza - and the repetitions in the 4th one work so well.
Well-deserved cherries, too. :)
JessicaA | July 13, 2012 - 20:16
Thank you, thank you so much Stan! :)
I love cotton-balls, too! Haha. I was thinking of them and then this idea just sort of came up. Glad you enjoyed.
Beeme | July 13, 2012 - 23:11
This is lovely jess, and there is something very comforting about cotton balls in a strange way. Well done of the cherry- richly deserved.
beeme xx
bonzo | July 14, 2012 - 00:24
I really liked the rhythm of the fourth stanza, but my favourite was the final one: a great declaration of love and intention to protect and cherish. The sleeper is very lucky!
JessicaA | July 14, 2012 - 02:04
Thanks Beeme. :)
Syphon | July 14, 2012 - 12:49
Very good poem Jessica congrats on the cherries well deserved.
Cavalcaderl | July 16, 2012 - 19:59
new JessicaA
Well deserved cherries!
Love the third stanza.
Also memories Dandelion clocks,used
play one o'clock two o'clock.
The cotton wool balls. Great.
Got pkt cleaning my nails,prefer roll.
I agree with Bonzo too comment.
julie x
JessicaA | July 18, 2012 - 00:27
Thanks Syphon and julie! :) Means a lot, really.
sue dinum | July 24, 2012 - 20:37
Yes, very well done, Jess and much deserved cherries. Like your prose, you seem to infuse your poetry with a surreal quality which I love; and I agree with Stan; I thought the changing form of the stanzas worked very well here. Much enjoyed.
Trev
hudsonmoon | July 27, 2012 - 16:56
Loved this, Jessica. Especially the last stanza. Beautiful.
Rich
JessicaA | August 31, 2012 - 04:18
Hmm...wow. Just now I see your comment, bonzo. So sorry about that. I appreciate your read, and I'm severely glad you enjoyed it. :)
And, yes, I agree. The sleeper is lucky, haha. (Kind of wish I was her... Hmph).
Thanks a bunch, also, Trev and Rich. Not sure why I haven't replied by now. But I loved both your comments! Your reads mean a lot. :)
mikepyro | September 5, 2012 - 01:23
This is easily one of your best, and honestly it's so much better than many of your poems I've reviewed because it does everything right, no wasted words, a strong flow, doesn't go off on wild tangents or mess with rhythm, this is what you need to focus on. Solid beats, fully formed ideas, humor mixed with beautiful imagery and emotion.
This is a great piece from you Jess, here's to more!
JessicaA | September 5, 2012 - 01:50
Thank you Mike. :) I just posted two new poems before reading your comment, and now I wonder if they comply.
mikepyro | September 5, 2012 - 02:14
I shall let you know later tonight.
Would you mind checking out one of my stories while you're at it?
JessicaA | September 5, 2012 - 02:14
Of course!
mikepyro | September 5, 2012 - 05:41
Got romantic comedies, horrors, violent thrillers, hard dramas, take your pic. I prob have a poem in there...like four years ago :P
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