Withdrawal

"She keeps forgetting what withdrawal feels like. When it returns with her carelessness, so does the nausea...the dizziness...the shaking...the regret." His cracked lips move elegantly as the soft words pour out through a dejected tone, "There she is. Happy. The pills are back in her system and her contentment is restored. They are like drugs to her, to her body and mind. And as the beast approaches from the horizon, its many eyes are golden and enraged, and its many tails are whipping through the surface of the vast body of clear water, creating great waves, which swallow her up as she dances on the shoreline under the sunset. Quickly, twilight befalls the satisfied monster, and then transforms into the dark of night in an instant. Why is it so...so...cruel?" — his dirty hand brushes throught the dark disheveled hair at the top of his head — "I loved her. More than anything. And all due to with ——" — the same hand is now balled into a loose fist, and the inner side of it presses against his lips as he recuperates from the break in his voice — "Pardon me...all due to the withdrawal, she's gone.

"We started out so happy and our minds were enough...they were free...they were independent. Celexa killed her. She felt like it created her happiness, it was the one thing that brought her mind back to the norm. Without it, she was good as dead. And now, she is. I didn't need pills to love. To feel under control. I needed her. But now...my childhood sadness has returned with my carelessness...so did the nausea...the dizziness...the shaking...the regret. I had forgotten what withdrawal feels like. I'm dead without her."

His eyes scan his quiet audience, rimmed with the darkest circles. After a short moment, he walks around the podium and steps off the stage. Everyone begins to clap as he saunters down the main aisle, his head bowed slightly and eyes wide and glazed over. He finally reaches a seat at the back of the room — where vacancy is most present — and sits down in a cold plastic chair. Some people near by look over at him, but he disregards every eye.