Her Final Prayer

She watches the pink sunset through the dirty window. She thinks of the man who came into her life and spun her world into chaos. His beautiful brown eyes captivated her and his voice was like a gentle storm. "Love"....he told her..... "is as two doves....sailing on winds of destiny....embracing their nature."

When he touched her....it was like soft little fires...sinking through her skin. She had never felt such bliss...ever.... because her life was set in tradition...her life wasn't hers at all.

She reached high....placed her finger on the window and made a small spiral. "This is me"....she whispered to herself....."I begin and I will end....I do not want to end.....I am only 29 years old."

She heard the laughter of children and pulled herself up higher by the window sill to look outside. They were kicking a soccer ball back and forth on the street. Her children were just a little younger than those boys. Her fingers hurt too bad to hang on the sill....she had to let go.

She sat on the wooden bench and felt the tears begin to flow. She caught them in her hands...not to stain her pure white gown.

She thought of her husband...such a cold and deep being. Her wedding was like following instructions of a technical manual. Her wedding night was no different. Her mother warned her of not serving his needs....her mother was a miserable soul....so possessed by her father's every wish.

She once was late serving her father his lunch...she stopped to pet a cat. Her mother took her left shoe off and beat her hands while she laid them on a wooden table. If she moved her hands....the beating went to her face. If she shed one tiny tear....her father would be told and he would beat her also....far worse.

The sun disappeared below the high window sill. She though it was like the eye of her father when he would glare at her...going down the steps by the half wall.

The only love she had ever known was with her children and the man with brown eyes. She desperately longed to hold her children again. She knew that another woman would raise them and hoped the woman wouldn't be cruel.

The man with brown eyes...stirred in her heart. She gave up everything to be with him for a few hours. Yet...in those few hours....she was a free woman....free to give herself and free to take a man she wanted. She clinched her fists and whispered passionately,"I loved...I got to love...I was wrong and I broke the law...but I....got...to...love."

She could hear the door squeak open and a man walking down the corridor. She looked up at his scornful face as he grumbled,"Time to meet the Satan....whore!"

She asked him for just a moment. He nodded.... yes....as she faced the wall under the window. She put her hands and forehead on the cold, filthy plaster.

She moved her mouth to this prayer,"Please...I beg...let the strongest men cast their stones first....let my pain be quick....let me not cry....please...I beg...let me not cry."