Author’s Note: To make the symbolism in this poem easier to understand I will explain some of its images/characters: The 'speaker/narrator' of this poem is God. The 'little boy' is me, you and everybody else in this world. The 'kite' represents hope. The 'line' represents faith. The 'clouds' represent different aspects of life. Enjoy the read ;-)
---
“The Cloud Gatherer”
Once upon a time
I knew a little boy –
young at heart,
broad in the shoulders,
taller than me, he was.
Others were humbled
at the tone of his voice.
A little boy, though, he was.
Sometimes, he played
his favourite game
and would invite me
to come and watch.
On the field he skipped,
gathering the clouds
with his shepherd kite.
To and fro he ran,
pulled here and there;
a little boy on a leash.
Sometimes, he stood
in one place and swayed
like fields of wheat in a trance,
bowing to an invisible audience.
The kite circled the sky;
trapped in a vortex
like a snowflake
in a crystal globe.
The boy’s heart,
knowing it was mere wax,
followed the kite
as it flew too close
to the sun.
I watched the boy
stretch out his hand
towards the kite
like a single blade of grass
reaching for the sky
in winter.
I watched him wait;
frozen in that position,
as if expecting something,
or somebody,
to grab his hand
and pull him up.
I watched the boy
loosen his grip -
the line escaping
his fingers.
The clouds dispersed,
looking for a fresh patch
of the sky to nibble on
like a flock that lost a shepherd.
He invited me
to watch him play,
but never asked me
to gather his clouds.
Nathan Bednarek 2009.
Comments
MistakenMagic | October 2, 2009 - 18:25
I really have been touched by this poem, Nathan and I'm so happy you decided to keep working with it. I love the idea of the poem's narrator being God - this poem has a very unique voice! It actually reminds me of Death in 'The Book Thief' - but in a positive way ;) Well done on this one!
Magic xxx
Nathan Bednarek | October 2, 2009 - 18:34
Cheers Magic! I appreciate it. Yes, I thought this poem deserved more work, so I'm really glad you got something from it ;-x
Silver Spun Sand | October 2, 2009 - 19:30
Nathan - I am so glad you reposted this. You have certainly worked hard on it. 'Shepherd kite' - I like that, very much.
I agree with everything Magic says. Although I haven't read the Book Thief in its entirety, I bought it for my daughter and she just raved about it and I have read a few extracts and 'know where Magic is coming from';-) as they say.
Well done, indeed;-)
Tina xxx
Nathan Bednarek | October 2, 2009 - 21:51
Thanks a lot Tina. I couldn't have done it without all your help! ;-)
Yes, the Book Thief is a modern masterpiece in my opinion and I'm really glad you think my poem has some similarities to it in terms of its tone ;-D
Thanks again.
xox
Beeme | October 4, 2009 - 13:29
I didn't think this could get any better, but due to your willingness to keep working, it has!
'I watched him wait;
frozen in that position,
as if expecting something,
or somebody,
to grab his hand
and pull him up.'
Wonderful, Well done!
Beeme xox
Nathan Bednarek | October 4, 2009 - 13:35
Cheers! I'm really glad you think so! x
tcook | October 6, 2009 - 10:32
Thanks to an email from Magic I have re-read this and, after careful consideration, decided upon a cherry for it. I must have been feeling grumpy when I read it first time through!
Nathan Bednarek | October 6, 2009 - 13:04
Thank you Tony- and thank you Magic!
I'm really glad you decided to give this a cherry as it is a very personal poem.
Grumpy eh? ;-p If it was possible not to ever be grumpy in Britain then life would be so much easier ;-p
Cheers!
Silver Spun Sand | October 6, 2009 - 18:35
Just popped back, Nathan, to say how thrilled I am that you got a more than deserved cherry for this one. You put so much of yourself and so very much hard work into it. Well done, indeed:-)
Tina xox
Nathan Bednarek | October 6, 2009 - 18:52
Cheers Tina! xox
marionwozere | May 10, 2011 - 22:49
This is really a beautiful poem, there's a kind of sadness that comes through in the watching and watching but it's somehow also tranquil and warm at the same time, wonderful! :)
Nathan Bednarek | June 20, 2011 - 23:20
Well, it's a very important poem to me, so I'm really glad you found it to be beautiful. Thank you for sucha lovely comment.
Nathan.