What's the most tasteless joke you've ever heard?

I've heard some really sick paedo jokes that aren't even funny. That Apple Crumble one is...mildly. Did you hear that Princess Di was on the radio a couple of weeks ago? Yep, and on the dashboard, and on the window, and on the hood.

the linda mccartney one i don't like. There's nothing more mind-teasing than the incomprehensible eagerly avowed - Dennet

I used to have a friend and I mean the words USED TO who had an unhealthy obsession with jokes relating to dead babies. There was also a number of jokes just after the tsunami which were pretty terrible, mind you jokes like that are always less distasteful the further in the past the actual event was. How long is it before something is allowed to be funny?

Back before I had several thousand qualifications and worked as a lowly commis chef in a four-star hotel, one of the sous chefs told me a 'dirty' joke that *still* makes me laugh/wince. But no, I can't say it on here as half the words would get asterisked. It might not go amiss in the 'Faeces' thread. Or the 'Fleeces' threads, for that matter...

Several. Alumyan Jaspershite Haemorrhoid Shorn Nelson oh fuck it why not.... Arseygurl

Heard! Nobcheese There's nothing more mind-teasing than the incomprehensible eagerly avowed - Dennet

Probably the paedo one where he takes the girl out into the wood at night, and the girl says, "It's scary out here," and the paedo says, "How do you think I feel? I've got to walk back on my own." Or the entire Chris Morris sketch about the unconcerned parents. "Hello? Yes? Oh dear - yes, that sounds like him. What? Oh..." (to wife) "They want us to go down to the station and identify the body." "Is he wearing his glasses?" (back to the phone) "Hello? Yes, is he wearing a pair of glasses with blue frames? Yes, that's definitely him then. What do you want us to do now? Oh? I thought you took care of that. Well, what are we supposed to do with it?" Or something along those lines. ~ I'll Show You Tyrants * Fuselit * The Prowl Log * Woe's Woe

Missi, I was on my way to feeling very, VERY hurt by your allegations, but I know that they're really just a cloak for your love of me. So I forgive you. *smooch*

ooooo, dunno whether i should tell this one. eeeek! What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes? Not a lot really , cos you've already told her twice!! I know awful isn't it?

I know a really bad one about a little black boy, diarrhea, and a freezer. I learned it maybe 25 year ago, and it wasn't okay then!

Can't say I like any of the above. I think humour should have some limits. Jokes about the holocaust, for example, will never be acceptable. ~PEPS~ “Underlay is overrated."

I used to have a Spanish friend who, despite being the sweetest guy you could hope to meet, would blythly tell particuarly offensive racist jokes. It was a cultural thing.

My stepdad is the master bar none of bad jokes. He's so good at telling them, he's halfway through the joke before you realise he IS telling a joke; as he's a paediatric nurse he has a particularly macabre sense of humour. I don't find racist jokes (or sexist jokes, for that matter) particularly offensive, unless I know that the person telling them actually *thinks* that way. But if a garden-variety Guardian reader told me one, for example, I'd probably find it funny, in a groaning 'god what an awful joke' kinda way. If they started telling me a whole string of them, however, I'd start to question whether they ought to switch their readership to another paper. The paraplegic jokes are the ones I find helplessly funny, even though, like most bad jokes, they're *not* really funny at all...

I agree with AG, though it's more of a 'you can't say that' response. The Guardian ran a few jokes you can't say section after the Danish cartoon business, mostly regarding priests. The most tasteless joke or comment I've ever heard, or rather read, was in an Irvine Welsh (that's spelt wrong isn't it?) interview in the Observer, it was something he'd said to a load of American business types and involved the holocaust. nobody

**Please be warned this is totally tasteless** http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-2566269671806009973 My webpage is at: http://www.bookscape.co.uk

"Scaramouche, scaramouche, did you kill Jill Dando?" "I'll take you up town and treat you like a princess - Twelve Pints then straight into a lamppost at high speed." "I'd like to protest against the prevalent stereotype that all lorry drivers are murders. Some of them are just rapists." Cheers, Mark

I know I shouldn,t have found this funny, but when the case of that young lad shot in Manchester was on the news last week, the Police spokesman said " we have absolutley no evidence that Jessie James was a member of a gang". I couldn,t help thinking "what about Frank, Cole Younger,.............."

"What is the sound of one arm rolling?"

How many private detectives is a dog supposed to have? Oh, I see what you mean... ~PEPS~ “Underlay is overrated."

_I_ understood that joke.