learning

when she was younger
she wanted to be something else
than what she became
when she met him---
it didn’t happen overnight,
she would explain to her friends who asked &
certainly, as this effect could of happened
at any point in her life
(as it had to friends of her who warned her
when they began to hear of how he was),
she might of expected it when she was
younger & the dreams seemed endless,
for then, if she was to lose one,
she would still of had a plethora to draw
from---
but as the years came on,
she didn’t want to be the one who wasn’t
with someone,
she didn’t want to be the one still living with her
mum &
not yet full set into a career that would keep the
cash flow coming---
stability lured her into these dream-mowers &
then he showed up---
he was beautiful, chiseled, financially stable &
everything that she swore she needed in a man,
until the fire began to ebb---
when the fading came,
he told her that she was wasting her time
pursuing her dream on the side &
that “art” was just something that people did
to make themselves feel better
(that she’d never make any money doing it,
so what was the point?)---
she should have left then
&
she knows that now
(a couple of years later, a few dreams now out of
reach)---
as she stuffs her suitcase full
while he is at work,
she swears that though he was successful in
stifling her for a while,
she will be successful in the dream of
leaving him for good.