The Morris Dancing Major

You’d think the major

would be enraged to look so strange,

doing his sidesteps full of frills.

In with the boys and bashing sticks,

and no dallying

with dancing girls.

So different for him from days

full of  square bashing drills.

He does look red and mad

beneath his pretty fringe of flowers,

but an hour's folk dancing

can do that to a military man.

Looks like he’s brewing a coup

against that man dressed up

like a dragon.

The dancing major is a spy

fighting un-jingo subversion

in these real ale ranks,

themorris men who hide

Remainer dark beneath

their  jolly fol-de-rols.