dumb tattoos

far be it for this writer to say that

all tattoos are fucking stupid,

but alas, a good portion

(like 99.9%) are.

 

certainly those that do not fall in this

category, are those that have been written

to remember a loved one who has

passed, or to commemorate the birth of

a son or daughter---

though, far be it for this writer to ask

why the hell

said tattoo enthusiast

couldn’t remember these dates,

as it is the very importance which they hold

that brought the individual to permanently

mark them on their body.

 

but you & i have met someone along the way or

perhaps we’re lucky enough to know them personally,

the bearers of dumb tattoos---

those that have been placed intentionally

in areas that can always be seen,

regardless of whether or not they try and cover them

up (quite possibly after regretting they ever had them done).

 

on the neck, on the hands, on the arms, on the cleavage, on

the legs… 

you can always tell how they feel about having gotten them

when you ask about them &

9 times out of 10,

they hang their heads in shame, while trying to act cool or

conjure some story about how they got them.

 

“tough guys” have “tough” tales &

“hot girls” have “hot” tales,

but regardless of what bullshit they pump out of their

mouth spout,

one can’t miss that little twinkle in their eye that signifies

the time when they got said tattoo is

gone &

it’s never coming back,

so at best, this stamp on their body is a nostalgic reminder of

when they were younger and they were more

“wild”---

and for those all up in arms

saying that they didn’t get a tat until they were older,

making the case that the last statement didn’t apply to you,

stop

pretending.

 

the most hilarious of the bunch

are those tattoos that you find when you get someone naked,

for they reveal even more about what the person thinks they are,

or worse yet,

what they thought they were---

these are even dumber than the ones that we can all see,

because one assumes that

less people see them,

so the possibility of removal for a job,

or just to save fucking face,

is found to be that much lower on the priority list.

 

but when clothes are removed, even though in the passionate throes of

sex,

you got to wonder what the fuck they were thinking---

oh, how many “tramp stamps” were plastered ugly on the lower backs

of really beautiful women,

even after the term

“tramp stamp”

was applied to such stupidity.

 

what goes through someone’s head

when they think they are being “mischievous,” or “kinky,” or

whatever,

when they get a tat on their genitalia---

one has to wonder if these same idiots have their fingers on the

buttons,

at the highest level of military dominance,

just waiting to show the world how big their

dick or

pussy

is.

 

at the end of the day,

a tattoo is yet another attempt at permanence---

it shows us people who think that some things never change,

in hope that because they think it,

that it won’t---

until that day when they wake the fuck up &

subsequently remove them the best that they can with the

laser,

or change it with the mediocre wit that Johnny made

“Winona”

“Wino,”

we who have not succumb to the delusions of permanence

and the stamps on our bodies that follow,

hold our tongues when we see them on those that can beat us

up,

hold our tongues when we see them on those we wish we could get

with &

when rolling in the sweaty sheets,

we do our best to concentrate on the sex &

not the ridiculous pictures,

names,

sayings

&

poems in languages

that the individual can’t even speak, etc.