The Birds
By hilary west
Fri, 15 Jun 2012
- 1302 reads
4 comments
Blackbirds gather on the path
Venting on each other wrath.
Catching dew from tall black tulips
As you or I would sip mint juleps.
Robins build a cosy nest
They make it warm with feathers dressed
And red geraniums are the blooms
That burn as bright as scarlet plumes.
A goldfinch settles on a branch
It looks for food, then takes a chance
On slugs and snails then turning up
When diving 'neath a buttercup.
A blue-tit under fountain spray
Spangles in the sunshine ray.
It loves the water of its bath
Which spills out onto speedwell paths.
All the birds that gather here
From over lea and over mere
Are so happy, so full of song
In this garden, they do belong !
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Comments
Was trying to pick a
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Was trying to pick a favourite stanza, hilary, but couldn't single one out. They are all little gems.
SSS;-)
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lots of interesting
lots of interesting observations, Hilary. I particularly liked "Which spills out onto speedwell paths", being very fond of the delicate flowers growing often in abundance.
It is probably your desire, but I did wonder if your really wanted the second 'so' in the last line but one? Similarly in the last line you could drop the 'they' or the 'do', but maybe you want the emphais, and slight change of rhythm! regards, Rhiannon
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For me the 4th stanza is my
Permalink Submitted by Mark Heathcote on
For me the 4th stanza is my fav but I loved it all… :)
Mark Heathcote
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