RE: Snippet from working novella

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RE: Snippet from working novella

Topic posted in response to Snippet from working novella : http://www.abctales.com/story/snuffy/snippet-working-novella

Could I get some feedback about my writing? I'm working on a novella, my first, and I would like people to give me some feedback on my style.

I hope you're really ready for this - first impression - sentences too long, love that old fashioned style. (either you do or you don't) I'd start further in, the start is mindbogglingly good, yet it's an easier hook to the mind from "I saw a boy, dark and malcontent..." something to consider?

maisie angel Guess what?  I'm still alive!

Thank you. I love Herman Melville's writing and he has had a huge influence on me. I seemed to have absorbed his lengthiness as well. No matter, this is unedited for representation of ideas, only edited for grammar. Some shorter sentences will be placed in there. As for the start, I may move those damned crows, but I'd have to examine the larger work and examine continuity. Thanks for the help! Any more comments are greatly appreciated. What did you think of the imagery?
i'm blasted away by the use of imagery :) the crows are brilliant even if a little 'used'. In the sense that we had crow films & books before. Not that you'd intend to use them the same way... or at least I'd hope not.

maisie angel Guess what?  I'm still alive!

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