The World’s going to End on December 21st

26 posts / 0 new

Sat, 2012-12-08 00:35

I’m not kidding! The place you want to be is Pic de Bugarach in the French Pyrénées, because in exactly two week’s time extraterrestrials are going to shoot out of the mountain and rescue everyone in the village. People are actually right now sitting on the side of the mountain waiting for a UFO to land and save them. And certain unscrupulous villagers are renting out rooms for £1200 per night!

Nasa has already been bombarded with over 5000 emails from suicidal people, saying they can’t sleep and asking if they should kill themselves, because on 21st December 2012 the rogue planet Nibiru is going to crash into Earth, and that’ll be the end of the human race as we know it. It’s all written down in an ancient Mayan calendar.

Out of those people who aren’t contemplating topping themselves, some are planning parties on the 20th, while others are hoarding supplies.

I’m a little sceptical though. You see it occurs to me that if Nibiru were close enough to crash into Earth in two weeks time, the old star gazers would have spotted it by now. And besides that, how would the Mayans know a UFO would arrive out of a mountain in France in 2012? I mean, they didn’t even see the Conquistadores Españoles on the horizon, did they?

I think you’ve more chance of being hit by a bus than by a rogue planet, but just in case I’m getting a few extra cases of London Pride in.

Sat, 2012-12-08 10:49

TheShyAssassin

London Pride? Adnam's Broadside surely.

Sat, 2012-12-08 11:12

The Other Terre...

But I've got 13 days leave starting on 21 Dec - why can't God wait until I'm back at work to bring about the end of the world?

Sat, 2012-12-08 13:10

God

Those Aztecs certainly knew a thing or two. A pity none of it was true. You people. Sometimes I wonder why I made you.

Sat, 2012-12-08 13:41

The Other Terre...

Is anyone else reading these messages from God or am I going mad?

Sat, 2012-12-08 14:05

God

You're going mad, but as long as you learn to type sanely nobody will notice.

Sat, 2012-12-08 14:39

scratch

Sat, 2012-12-08 14:40

scratch

I'm loving this thread tis a pity I'm dead

Sat, 2012-12-08 15:03

TheShyAssassin

Oi God! Bugger off or I'll tell Richard Dawkins.

Sat, 2012-12-08 15:13

#10

God

He's a bit of a dawk but harmless. I like to see the looks on the faces of the unbelievers when I tell them what's in store for them in the afterlife, which is to persuade people that I don't exist when they see me on the telly every night. I host the One True God Show - seven o'clock every weekday. Chris Evans and Mary Magdalene do it on Fridays.

Sat, 2012-12-08 15:53

#11

Highhat

well-all I can say is I couldn't care less if the world is going to end.

Sat, 2012-12-08 16:21

#12

TheShyAssassin

Oi! Dawkins! Sort 'im aht!

Sat, 2012-12-08 16:32

#13

Highhat

The right end of the sausage- not both ends.

Sun, 2012-12-09 12:21

#14

Cavalcader

new cavalcaderl No! it won't with all the hype, in papers. Think positive? Been man scares. But all the people going mad over it all,never believe the moon is cream cheese,saying,don't believe in books and facts,like a migraine.all will pass away. Hysteria makes millions times worse. Continual life normally. The Olde Devil moon always be there,and mighty one! What will be,will be,can't afford anymore to worry! Aye. Everyday somewhere someone is it's. nature. julie x

Sat, 2012-12-08 20:18

#15

scratch

You're right Julie.

Sat, 2012-12-08 20:32

#16

Richard L. Prov...

I am not worried about Dec 21, 2012. I'll be writing a poem then and being close to my wife.

Richard L. Provencher

Sat, 2012-12-08 21:39

#17

scratch

Richard you have calmed my nerves, but just in case I am going to cancel my milk too.

Sat, 2012-12-08 21:44

#18

Highhat

I will cancel as well! The milk ie the last time this happened I had to drink black coffee in the morning.

Sat, 2012-12-08 23:07

#19

Parson Thru

What time is it due? I've got a dental appointment at 11:00. Should I cancel it?

Parson Thru

Sat, 2012-12-08 23:23

#20

karl_wiggins

My boy tells me I've got it all wrong. The Mayans forgot bto include leap years, so the end of the world doesn't happen until about June.

Sun, 2012-12-09 04:20

#21

peterelbee

21st of December aye? No point paying any more bills then or renewing subscriptions. So long and thanks for all the fish.

Sun, 2012-12-09 07:58

#22

Parson Thru

Might as well get my teeth done. Shame. I was looking forward to that

Parson Thru

Sun, 2012-12-09 08:26

#23

Highhat

I'm going to follow suit and get my teeth done too- never know who you meet in the afterlife.

Sun, 2012-12-09 12:19

#24

Cavalcader

new cavalcaderl Yeh! ,mine awful,better not smile too much Missing all great cakes. All things,just softish food. Some mine some false! Lost one,not my fault? julie x

Sun, 2012-12-16 15:13

#25

The Other Terre...

Of course the Mayans really said that 21 Dec marked the start of a new cycle, and many see it simply as the beginning of a new and better time. Given that I've got 10 days off starting that date, I'd probably have to agree with them.

Sun, 2012-12-16 21:34

#26

SoulFire77

Good thing I don't have to "cancel the milk", over here the milk waits at the store until I go get it. I'm still disappointed that Judgement Day didn't happen last May. I had to look at one of these stupid signs on my street for nothing... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Judgment_Day_21_May_2011_%28English%29... And here I thought Jesus was finally coming to take all of his idiots home with him. I'm hoping for the best on the 21st.