A Thread for New Stories by Fred Venturini

If you like you can read my storys. One is already cherrypicked. its called "Black Stars and My Obession with Fire"

fventurini: Stretcher of Faces, felt very Silent Hillish to me in some parts. I like that. Your discriptive writing style is wonderful, causing the reader to “feel” the scenes. That is an erry way of being made to be part of the story. You drew me in – made me really experience the action, and even though you made me want to run and hide – I could not stop reading until the end. Even though I am not a big fan of present tense voice, I loved the story. Wonderful. If a story written in present voice doesn't grab be quickly - I will put it away. I really don't like that style of writing. So, believe me when I say - you held me fast with this piece. Good job! There was only one thing I think you might want to consider. It came near the beginning of the piece: Razor-thin crimson lines dry to a scab on his forearms and cheeks. (I think it would be better if you made the word ‘scab’ plural.) Stretcher of Faces gave me the creeps – I loved it. Thank you so much for an ejoyable read.

I like to write horror too, but mine seem so...simplistic, compared to this piece.

I was a really big fan of P.I.N. I found myself feeling sympathetic at first for the old man. Then the record store clerk. I was in the record store clerk's position all too many times in my previous jobs. You really nailed the feeling of having to break the news to an old man that he's been passed over by time.

I have written and posted nearly a score of stories and poems, but the advice and comments have been rather thin on the ground. If you could review one piece i would be very grateful for the feedback! http://www.abctales.com/user/jacobea