Small talk by Rokkitnite

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Small talk by Rokkitnite

http://www.abctales.com/story/rokkitnite/small-talk

The line at the end of the first verse (? is that what you call it?) made me laugh out loud.

Here's my effort at constructive criticism - the line about the steak seemed a little out of place.

The spunk bit was brilliant. They do exactly that, don't they - you've just ruined sausages for me.

Okay - I was trying to link it in with the BBQ talk but maybe I should choose something else. D'you think I'm better off going with something weirdly specific ('Ziggy Stardust', 'birthday cakes', 'England v Paraguay', etc) or something more abstract? (i.e. 'being faithful', 'getting a mortgage', 'love') Thanks v much, by the way - trying to do simple stuff at the mo. A lot of my ideas have been way too grand to work.
house prices are traditional I believe

 

ooh, if I were choosing, I'd go with being faithful - guaranteed to make over half the company squirm at a BBQ.
I like the idea of religion, or fidelity. Football would be talked at bbq's, and wouldnt make anyone uncomfy, I like the way you have introduced a subject that will make people pause, couscous stuffed roasted red capiscum halfway to gob in horror. You kind of have to follow bbq rules dont you... admire the hostesses buddliea, waggle your drumstick at the new water feature admiringly. Agree about the steak line though, it doesn't really give anything... you need something more. Whats the point of fidelity if there is zilch after?
Enzo v2.0
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I'm with Lou & P.r., being faithful or fidelity is great, packs a punch. Better than steak. Alternatives might include: sunny days (link to BBQ) or laughter (eek, that'd even shut me up)...but fidelity is great. Also chucked at that same line. You're a funny f**ker, Rokkitim.
Duly noted and updated. Much better, methinks. Thanks!
i really liked this tim, it has a very stripped down feel that works. i like the contrast of talking about religion and watching sausages spunking.
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