Writing stuff after being dumped

dumpee stuff tends to be a lot nicer than what you might expect, not shouting thru the letterbox as liana put it! it's sad and sometimes hopeful, excepting "justice" poems like wolfgirl described. think it's handy to walk a middle line between sadness and anger, since it's never too healthy to be too twee or too outraged, doesnt translate as well most of the time. a good exception to this is lianas last poem (?) about wanting news of a buggers death. i think everyone has felt that way at some point, so there is a writer-reader connexion. maybe there is hope for writing a good dumpee poetree if this is exploited? im not recommending everyone kills their ex in verse but it made a change from some of the usual same old same old. nonsensically yours, rick

I think that dumped individuals feel emotions in stages. It would be interesting perhaps to write a poem at the sharp end ie the very early shock stage, then one at anger, then the bittersweet sadness that Richard describes, finally followed by a little perspective requiem. Comparing might be quite a revelation. I haven't written poetry for a long time (thank God sigh a chorus of poetry lovers) but it might be an interesting experiment. However, I'm reluctant to get my partner of a decade to dump me in order to find out. Oh well, just a retrospective for me then.

Hello. It was Fish that said that about the letterbox Rick, though I'm happy to take all credit for it. Liana SmallRedFiat Belgrade.

Yes whe you are pissed of you tend to write with deeper feelings. Somtimes that's the only poem people Write, when they have a dark day; and never write another one.

Fishwife has said on the autobiographical thread, about the wonderful way you can write about someone after bein dumped, instead of all the undignified shouting through letterboxes and stuff. I think shes got a really valid point there :o) I write a lot about relationships, though not exclusively, and not strictly always about my own. I think that poetry can really help both the writer and an anonymous reader when its about relationships. There is the way that the writer can unburden all kinds of emotions; grief, anger, pain, and then mr/mrs. anonymous reader can think "Chris, yes, thats exactly how it feels, glad I'm not the only one...." Or maybe they just cant express things in the way that the writer could, and it helps them to realise things about their own relationships. Edna St. Vincent millay does it for me, every time, allergic as I am to rhyme. (Ooops, inadvertant rhyme there) and her stuff, though it can be thought of a maudlin, isnt tosh by any means :o) A long and boring post, sorry chucks...

errrm ... interesting question martin ... but sorry ... wouldn't know ... (sniggering)

BTW liana ... who is Chris???

* HOOTING with laughter*

Chris is obviously the saviour, Fish, you silly person.

Can't find smspoems, Martin. Can you please elaborate?

Revenge is wonderful to write about and killing someone in print is so much more convenient than a spell in prison. You can truly whistle while you work, creating your own little just world where exes can be despatched slowly and painfully. There's no physical exertion, no mess and you can have a cup of tea while you watch. How civilised. Oh and a jaffa cake. Let's not forget.

I don't quite believe you ifb, we've all been dumped. My point was that can we enjoy reading about something as painful and traumatic as being dumped can be. Are we supposed to enjoy it ?

Not exactly enjoy it..maybe identify and gain something from it?

i enjoy it ...

Enjoy what.......being dumped ?

Ta, Martin. Thought I'd tried that but will redouble my efforts...

spab enjoys being dumped