The Scientific Method

UGH I'm irritated. I wrote out a very long response to your piece but I got some error when i submitted it and now it's gone. You get a lot less, but I'll give you what I remember. The first section of the piece, I think, feels homeless. I read all the description and it's nice, but I'm not committed to the characters yet, I'm not hooked in enough, to navigate trhought stilted and sometimes structurally/grammatically diluted descriptions. Structure and grammar hurt (passive voice and too much many adverbs and adjectives in particular), but on the second read, when I was less distracted and more aware fo the characters, I really enjoyed your word choice. The words sound and well, taste like Rupert. I became moderately engaged in the second section, and then fully exchanged as soon as masturbation came up. Ruperts obsession with masturbation, intellectual arrogance, idealistic view of truth and science, almost sexual relationship with science (before he is jade), all remind me of A Confederacy of Dunces. The physicality of the narrator's descriptions of Rupert are also reminiscent of Confederacy. I was surprised that Rupert doesn't mention Boethius, Ignatius Reilly's (the main character in Confederacy) favorite philosopher, among his list of favorite philosophers. The ending was okay. I'm not sure i understand why you didn't get the reader a more inside view on what exactly happened. If, as the narrator says, this is rupert's story, then don't leave me hanging! c.w.workshop