Puss in boots

The old miller had kicked the bucket
So at the firm of Smythe &; Ducket
His Will and Testament was read
To his three sons, Bill, John and Fred.
My eldest son, hard working Bill,
Inherits my life's work, the mill,
My horse and cart to Fred, his brother,
I hope they'll work with one another.
And unto John, my youngest son,
The bone idle and shady one,
I leave my tom cat Hercules
(You even get to keep the fleas!)
John wandered off despondently
And went to fetch his legacy
A rather mangy looking tabby
All moth-eaten and very shabby,
With half an ear and one eye missing
It looked at him and started hissing.
What John did not know yet was that
This evil looking alley cat
Could do a really nifty trick,
Just give him any lock to pick
He'd use one elongated claw
And deftly unlock any door.
John sheepishly called, "Here Puss Puss,
"I really don't want any fuss,
"Come here and get into this box."
Cat stared back like some weird Cyclops.
Then eerily sneered, "Listen mate,
"We need to get a few things straight.
"I take orders from no-one, right!
"I sleep all day and work at night,
"Cat burgling is my stocking trade,
"Join me kid and your fortunes made.
"I've got a job for you and me,
"We're going to rob a pharmacy,
"I know for sure there's bags of loot
"Down at our local high street Boots."
John knew deep down that this was wrong
But still agreed to go along.
That night at nearly twelve o'clock
The cat skillfully picked the lock,
They sneaked inside and crossed the store
Until they reached the office door.
"The safe", cat said, "Is kept in here,
"I'll blow it open, you stand clear."
What followed was a mighty BOOM!
Which threw young John across the room.
He landed in a pile of soap,
The cat called out, "You stupid dope!"
"D'you mind", sobbed John, "I've hurt my arm",
"And tripped", cat yelled, "The stores alarm!"
A light flashed at the local nick,
BOOTS IS BEING ROBBED, COME QUICK!
The air was filled with sirens wailing
John jumped up, his arms a flailing.
The cat now for the door was reaching
He heard the sound of tyres screeching.
A blue light flashed around the shops.
The cat yelled, "CRIPES! Here come the cops!"
The boys in blue rushed through the doors,
"You're nicked!" they yelled, "Stick up your paws."
Then handcuffed cat and John as well
And led them off down to the cells.
Next day they both were up in court.
The judge, a learned looking sort,
Said, "It is my informed decision
"To give you both ten years in prison.
"I hope this makes you mend your ways
"And learn that crime just never pays."