My local’s full of children trying to be grown up,
They look eighteen at fifteen, the scumbags and the sluts.
The fuck is going on here? They all gel down their fringe,
And the jukebox plays a remix to make you fucking cringe.
But the barman plays it cute like he’s no fucking idea,
And anyway they’ve gone and got their brother’s old I.D.
They spend their Daddy’s money and they vomit it back up,
And they’re fighting and they’re crying and they have to get picked up.
And they’re fucking in the toilets and they’re kissing in the corners,
Well it makes us feel so old but it makes us feel mature.