iHoliday

iHoliday

when we landed at iBeefa
i hadn’t even left the airport
and i’d sorted enough pills
to see us through the holidays
i was so well up for a good time
nothing
i mean nothing
was gonna prevent that

you certainly didn’t hang around
acting the big i am
chatting up that girl dj
right in front of me
and those two tarts with the big tits
and g-string bikinis from billericay
you can try that
chill out babe we’re on holiday
and i was out of it
routine if you like but it won’t wash
we are so through
it’s not even
that you scored a bag of weed
smoked it all with the lads
on the beach
that has really pissed me off

you total utter BASTARD
you nicked my bag of E’s

and vn now as i writ a postcard hom
th irony of scribbling this incohrnt
nonsns is that mum and dad
will think i’m off my had
‘cos thy won’t know som piggy bastard
orribl git nickd my stash
i hat you
you scum facd bldr
and your pathtic xcus for a pnis