Been here three weeks or more,
this one. It’s OK; she can’t hear you...
With the fairies, half of the time –
the rest...she’s asleep. Her kids
drop by, occasionally; voice
their concerns. People expect
miracles, these days. ‘She’s old’,
I explain. God knows, we do
what we can, but we don’t
do miracles.
As for the commode; just ignore
her tears and protestations – ensure
she sits there, though your reward
will, more than likely, be zilch.
And then what does she do? Soils
the bed, doesn’t she? Don’t worry –
in a while you’ll get used to the stench...
it won’t make you want to puke...well,
not as much. ‘So, how are we today
then, Betty?’ See – she can’t hear me.
What did I tell you!
“Oh, but I can...I’ve lost the power
of speech – not my mind, nor
my dignity, although you do your best
to take it from me. Made to relieve
myself in full view of the ward....
my throat parched; lips cracked
and dry...festering bed-sores.
Hungry – thirsty; meals left
out of reach, and even if not,
no possible way I can hold
a knife, spoon or fork.”
By the way, she never eats a thing –
a complete waste of National Health
resources; we just take her plate
away, food untouched. Not our job
to feed them. What the hell
did we get our degrees for?
Not to be glorified carers,
that’s for sure.
“‘She’d be better off dead...her
and the rest of these sad geriatrics.’
I haven’t heard you say it, but
I can see it in your eyes. If you look
in my handbag, there’s a photo
of the girl I used to be...and,
the funny thing is, if you asked her,
she’d agree.”
Comments
SundaysChild | October 14, 2011 - 19:49
Striking Tina. x
Highhat | October 14, 2011 - 20:55
Can they really care so little? Sort of shocked me but I think you have captured a cruel world very well. I had hoped it had improved since I was young and that there is a different mentality today. When I was young I worked in a nursing home and some of the staff were a bit harsh on the elderly. The staff used to tease little innocent me!
;)Pia
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2011 - 08:56
My thanks to you, Sundays ;-)x
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2011 - 09:07
Hi there, Pia.
It seems that things have not improved, according to a survey done by the Care Commisssion, which was highlighted by the British media a day or so ago.
After carrying out spot checks at geriatric wards in 100 hospitals, the commission found that 35 needed to make improvements, 18 were failing to meet legal standards and there were “major concerns” at two trusts. In far too many cases, unacceptable care has become standard, with doctors and nurses talking down to patients, ignoring their calls for assistance and failing to help them eat, drink or wash.
Its report is the latest to conclude that pensioners, who account for almost half of in-patients, are routinely denied the most basic care because of a culture of neglect among staff.
Not only this, but over the years I have had quite some personal experience in this field, and, unfortunately, know it to be true.
Thanks, so much, for reading, and for your words, Pia;-)
Tina
skinner_jennifer | October 15, 2011 - 10:12
Hello Tina,
firstly can I say how well you've written this piece,
but secondly I think it's so sad that this is what we
have to look forward to in old age. The deterioration
of the body is inevitable for that we have to accept,
but why oh why do people not see that in our minds we
are still the same as what we were when we were young? I'm not so much dreading old age, but I really
hope I don't become that dependant on others for help, though like the lady in your piece it scares the pants off me.
But can I say again, how well you've written this
piece, I commend you, because it needed to be said.
Thankyou for sharing.
Jenny.
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2011 - 10:21
Thank you so very much, Jenny for your inspired words. I couldn't agree with you more. I do hope that things are set to change, now that these alarming facts have been brought to the public's attention.
I am really pleased you got something from it, and as you say, 'some things need to be said'.
Have a good weekend;-)
Tina
Dark Fox | October 15, 2011 - 11:01
This has touched me. My mum works in old peoples homes giving them the gift of music. She has seen first hand (and so have I, as I used to help) the digusting way the staff treat the elderly. I was shocked to see a lady ignore an elderly lady who said clearly she needed to go the bathroom. She soiled herself in front of everyone in the holding room.
We should treat the elderly with respect. Be respectful to your elders.
It was beautifully written and had both views and it was a wonder to read.
Dark Fox
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2011 - 12:06
Dark Fox what a wonderful thing your mother does;-) Music is so very therapeutic for all ages, but never so in homes for the elderly.
Both my daugters were nurses...and one of them worked as an agency nurse for several nursing homes and, like yourselves, she saw, first-hand, some of the appalling things that go on.
As you say, we need to treat the elderly with the respect they deserve, but until that happens, the suffering will continue.
So pleased you got something from this, and many thanks for sharing your own moving story.
Tina
ScoZen | October 15, 2011 - 17:25
How sad all this is Sand Lady.
You do wonder how all this can still happen in this day and age but regretably I'm afraid it does.
As for the Care Commission, they are next to useless
I need to finish now in case I launch into a string of expletives about the NHSless?
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2011 - 18:18
Thanks, ScoZen. I rather thought that this one might 'get your goat'...so to speak. And so sad, it surely is.
Have a good weekend;-)
Sand Lady