Waltzing Matilda

Yes, Mr Churchill had a lot to answer for. I liked the fifth verse and the way that the rhymes become less followed. And I liked the 'coats of fire' line. That old Pogues song on the same subject takes some beating but this comes as close as any I've heard.

New Silver-spun-sand
Really good historical
poem, very well thought out.
Cockerel crows,and boy's to men.
But fourth stanza
that begins:I like.
The sweethearts wave and say goodbye,
the children ask their elders, 'Why?'
"For King and country,"they reply
and as the clock chimes half-past five,
they ride off in coats of fire
julie xx.

Hi Tina,

Really liked this. Just a teensy weensy suggestion, to keep the rhyming scheme going you could change "in a dream that turned to dust" to "in a dream that none rode off in" (ties in nicely to last line of previous verse).

You create the atmosphere really well, the contrast between the partying at the start and the horror of the battle works really well.

Yet more good stuff.

David xx :--)

Didn't he just...Mr. Churchill.

My thanks to you for reading and for your inspired comments and as for The Pogues, now you really are talking.

Tina

Julie - you picked my favourite lines;-) Thank you for reading and for your intuition;-)

Tina xx

David...I could hug you. Oops;-) Joking aside, I was having real trouble with that line (which I guess was obvious) and your suggestion is pure gold. Thank you for it. It works most admirably.

I have worked long and hard over quite a few years with this one and your comment meant so much to me.

Tina xx;-)

You hug away!! Thank you so much for allowing me to make a suggestion let alone taking me up on it.

David xx :--)

;-) Thanks again...and I might just take you up on that, David;-)

Tina xx

Very effective, dance rhythm drives the narrative to its conclusion. Clever. atb lena xx

Wasn't sure if anyone would pick up on this, lena and I am delighted to find that you did (but not surprised;-) My thanks to you for your, as always, considered and helpful comments.

Tina xx

A wonderful tale, all the verses are brilliant and the rhyming seems so effortless, which is the beauty of putting in so much work, A triumph,

Wow, Shirley! You have put a great big smile on my face now...which is just as well because my washing machine has just gone on the blink;-)

Seriously though, thanks for reading and for your priceless words of encouragement.

Tina

I remember this one, Tina! And, as always, I am very fond of the imagery in the first stanza and the whole melancholy yet beautiful feel of the poem. Well done on this one ;)

Magic xxx

Thanks, dear Magic. Yes, I have so struggled with this and one day I WILL get it right, I promise.
Glad you enjoyed it and thanks for telling me;-)

Tina xxx

Hi Julie. About your problems with the 2 emails. Could be that whoever sent them, has contacted you via your 'Contact' information on your 'Personal Page. I.e. the one that comes up when you right click your mouse over your name.

If you need any further help, just shout;-)

Tina xx

new silver-spun-sand
I am not good at explaining.but we have 5 re-mote controls t.v.same.This is 3rd comment on punctuation now one plural's! = where it has one and not.What means what.But Different kind one each time of correction,to Puntuation not easy at all for me.hard for me.Thankyou for excellent
help.Yep! willdo.In life too.Shame after lovely Editor's t.cook Tony and Abctales and all.
new version for me slight punctuation so I can watch it too.Like you good compliment.I am a "L" confusing
to me.To much punctuation,each person is different way we think.If I don't grasp.something I can't.
thankyou so much.Water bottle burst,every where!
hence poem,"The Burst Bubble".Wet bed the lot.
got to go for now.
Thankyou
julie xx
.

I like this a lot ,Tina. You are such a talented writer x:)

I too remember this one Tina and I'm glad you reposted this. A very effective poem and a well deserved cherry ;-)

Nathan.

My thanks to you, Nathan. Nice of you to pop by;-) I hope life is treating you kindly and have a good weekend.

Tina xox

new Silver-Silver-spun-sand
Just seen many congrat:
on the cherry!wonderful history
Just received 2 emails,seem connected
can't understand.One states I don't make sense
slipped on keys!
One says A good idea,What?
Abctales.any help on this I usually
answer then I click on,says something
like Editor etc: Abctales thanks you for feed back.
Baffled me.Haven't done so yet
Thankyou as up till 3.a.m. but deleting
Thankyou found RobertGardner on here!
so answer.and why haven't made sense.
Good news Paper's on about discovery MS
As person's wife had,now go to Poland says
100's going,operation neck,I think build up
of Iron etc;to brain,but wouldn't want them !to have.And "The Sun" report's people .on experiences
happened nearly died,very interested."Brilliant Light". Have good Valentine day.Mine no justice
How other's think their mad.true.Doing debate scientifally.
I know all that.O hospital's,accidents,what- ever.
Floating, and out of body experiences and pain.
How come back new into "The Light".or the body is
mangled.Spiritual is wondeful thing,and prayer's and doing?
julie xx

Absorbing and rich, full of textures- what a great piece of writing x

So great to hear from you, Sunday's child. Really.

And to know that you liked this one is a real bonus xx

Tina