I sit opposite an empty chair;
Your chair!
The photograph album falls open;
Same page!
You all in white, me in Tuxedo;
Starry eyed!
‘Look like you’re in love!’
Impatiently!
I unzipped my trousers, pulled out my shirt
You giggled!
‘Is that better or do you want them off?’
He blushed!
‘You’re marrying a lunatic, you know!’
Mascara running!
The camera flashed as my tongue came out;
Oh bugger!
You said you’d burn it if I ordered the print;
You didn’t!
How many times did we laugh at that picture?
Countless!
Now I smile and the tears fall helplessly;
Joy and sadness!
This lunatic that you married, Loves you still;
Always will!
Soon there will be only the photograph;
Two chairs!
Comments
jennifer | March 5, 2009 - 23:12
'He blushed?'
is that right? thought they called it 'civil partnership' just to be discriminatory....
am I reading it wrong?
J x
threeleafshamrock | March 5, 2009 - 23:23
'He' was the photographer. He was an asshole but a great photographer, I wound him up on the day; the madder he got the more we laughed. I think he was batting for the other side too - not criticising, just stating a fact ;) He calmed down when I reminded him who was paying him :-)
Nathan Bednarek | March 6, 2009 - 00:11
This is actually very crafty. The thing about this poem is that it's actually surprisingly good. Don't get me wrong, your poetry is always very good, but sometimes poets seem to forget that a poem that is very good is even better if it's not obvious. I hope you know what I mean. I don't want this to sound the wrong way. ;-/
Anyways, the poem is great and the way it builds up to the ending is just masterful. Well done. ;-)
Nathan.
Silver Spun Sand | March 6, 2009 - 09:17
Nathan got it in one. Masterful! Much enjoyed, Chris:-)
Tina X
Ewan | March 6, 2009 - 09:29
Very good; liked this one because of the subtext. Nice circular route back to chair(s). So much greater than the sum of its parts, this one, for me.
'Two chairs', just thinking about what that means, I take my hat off to you.
Multum in parvo.
regards
Ewan
luigi_pagano | March 6, 2009 - 10:00
Very nicely done, Chris. Enjoyed it a lot.
jennifer | March 6, 2009 - 10:06
Oh I see! Hilarious story!
Nathan : 'sometimes poets seem to forget that a poem that is very good is even better if it's not obvious'
yes, it's ok, ambiguity rules, just came across oddly to me since I don't assume that everyone is heterosexual...but most gay men I know don't tend to wear mascara...
J x
Ewan | March 6, 2009 - 10:43
Actually I assumed the bride's mascara was running, probably because she was laughing.
Equally, I found the ending quite sad... one chair empty at the start, one person's happy memories of another, two chairs soon to be empty at the end, impending death.
Of course, this may not be the intention at all, but that's how I read it.
lenchenelf | March 6, 2009 - 11:07
Funny, poignant, cleverly constructed as you've "snapped" back and forth between the individuals and move the scenes on, terse, visual and effective.I read it similar to Ewan, but may be mistaken. Well written Chris atb L
_lynze_ | March 6, 2009 - 20:31
Really liked this one, nice ;)
Pretty sure i read this right lol
-Lynze x
threeleafshamrock | March 7, 2009 - 15:15
Thanks a lot folks! Been away for a couple of days and came back to a pleasant surprise. Ewan, you have nailed it! Mascara belong to bride 'because she was laughing' and your second comment is exactly correct as well. L. also got it right! I also know where you are coming from Jen. Sometimes the writer of a piece forgets, that what is personally known to him/her is not generally known to the reader. Sorry if it was a little confusing. Thanks for all the comments folks; I'm chuffed! ;) Appreciate you all taking the time.
threeleafshamrock | March 7, 2009 - 15:17
Goodness, only just noticed the cherry. I should go away more often LOL. ;) ;) Thanks so much!
Dynamaso | March 9, 2009 - 02:33
And a well-deserved cherry it is too. I thoroughly enjoyed this one, mate.
threeleafshamrock | March 9, 2009 - 18:28
Cheers D.