Don't tell anybody

My heart will never mend. But don't tell my son.
I will never be sane again.But it will look so.
He will be on my mind forever.I was in love and lost my mind for good.Now I am living on the egde. But don't tell my son. I have told him that I miss the one and only love of my life whom I have lost.
It really hurts.I just want to fly away to the clouds and lie on a pink one and look up at the moon ,all golden and elegant.I am weak- so weak now, that I have to dig up all the good memories. I ruined every single moment.He ruined a few himself. I feel so guilty. I am afraid too.I am alone.I am afraid of love.
Don't tell my son.