Glib by ErikVonDohlen
Fri, 2007-06-08 16:20
#1
Glib by ErikVonDohlen
http://www.abctales.com/story/ericvondohlen/glib
This is great.
The narrator's a bastard of the highest order. Erik, I hope for your sake it's not autobiographical!
Gareth.
drew_gummerson
Yeah I liked this. It was full of amusing little details and I liked Wanda (is that right). I would have liked to have known more about her. I would have liked a bit more story I suppose because as it is, it's a series of anecdotes; no bad thing because they are funny and interesting and well written.
ggggareth
Hi Drew. It's one of those tough choices, I think; the story reads extremely well at the moment, and the focussed viewpoint of the narrator helps to reinforce his (I suppose it's a him) bastardish qualities.
To draw this out to "traditional" length might lose that focus, and at the same time lose (in my opinion) the strength of the story.
I know what you mean though: fleshing it out might have gained some pathos.
Like I said: tough choice.
drew_gummerson
Don't get me wrong, I did like it!