four days by saffyjo

http://www.abctales.com/story/saffyjo/four-days

This is a good short story, the opening draws you in, why did he leave her. Then through the actions of the wife you see why he left. I like the way you don't spell out her obsessivness, each action building on the next one.

i think it could do with some more tweaking, e.g.

"I arrive home from work around 3, check the chicken has defrosted I laid out the night before, place the bag of fresh veg on the marble worktop."

how do you check the chicken is defrosted? and do you need to say 'i laid out the night before'.

"Despite him knowing I like him to be sharp, he practically always arrives 10 minutes late."

do you need the word 'practically'

"It's then I see the note again, folded up.
Told you I'd had enough ,it reads. will pick up my stuff on Friday when you're at work."

i would rephrase this, start with her picking up the note and unfolding it, then you don't need, "it reads" in the middle of the message.

I though the ending was good, but would he really have come back that easily, and as it is not over-long i would have liked some reference to how they used to be, i assume she wasn't always like that. She must have reflected on why he had left her and the flashback may provide that constrast.

These are merely suggestions, it is a really good story, but i know i appreciate a fresh perspective on my own work.

Juliet