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Quietly the arms of a creation reaches forward..

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Published by Beeme on July 10, 2009 - 18:59

Quietly the arms of a creation reaches
forward amidst a room thrust into the
silence of existence. Each of its bones
working in unison, raising its arms and
placing its metallic hands into another's-
touching but with no spark of emotion.
Quickly I realize that my peach arms are
so still that even I feel robotic...
Through the mist of perfection I am sending
messages of hope into its grey telescopic eyes,
from my own. The next person whispers rumours
of humanity.
I wait,
to hold its lonely armoured body.
I stretch,
to hold its fingertips and fold its stiff hands into
my own.
Begging to install some love.

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Comments

threeleafshamrock | July 10, 2009 - 19:29

Good effort Beeme on a tough assignment. I'll go and read Jupe's now....I bet it's about 3 pages long lol.

Chris ;)

MistakenMagic | July 10, 2009 - 19:57

Congrats on your joint win Beeme!

Some of the lines here as so delicious, my favourites:

'The next person whispers rumours
of humanity.'

and

'I stretch,
to hold it's fingertips and fold it's stiff hands into
my own.'

Well done, you've been producing some superb stuff recently!

Magic xxx

SundaysChild | July 10, 2009 - 19:58

Congrats, Beeme! This is a fascinating poem.
Good job :)

Beeme | July 10, 2009 - 20:03

Thank you so much Magic, I'm glad you enjoyed this!
and thank you for your all important vote ;)
Hope you continue to enjoy my work xx

Congrats, Sundayschild. Your poem is pure excellence!
Well done :)

Thank you Chris, and thanks for taking part :)

pinda | July 10, 2009 - 20:45

Congratulations mate,I've congratulated all of you on Jupiters message but not on yours. Just thought I would let you know, you produced some brilliant work

Beeme | July 10, 2009 - 20:48

Thanks so much Pinda! :)

Jupiter | July 10, 2009 - 22:32

Yo Beeme - you really rose to the challenge as I hoped you would. Check out these comments above - superb achievement! Well done ;-)

whiskey | July 12, 2009 - 12:09

Congrats on your joint win, Beeme.:-)

A small point, if you don't mind me mentioning it - the possessive pronoun should be its not it's. It's is the contracted version of it is.

I thoroughly enjoyed this, and that last line was particularly clever, I thought. Looking forward to reading more. :-)

Beeme | July 12, 2009 - 16:49

Thank you Whiskey, thanks for the pointer, that really helped this poem make more sense :-)

Glad you enjoyed, looking forward to hearing more from you :)

Beeme