The Open Door
Come walk awhile with me, my love
Come walk awhile with me
Together as we were before
Yet still I yearn for so much more
So let us walk to yonder hill
Where once we sat so calm and still
With Nature cloaked in Sunday best
While we took leave to take our rest
But now I must take you back, my love
But now I must take you back
Visiting time is nearly over
Birdsong will so soon sound
And I must return to a world
Where I cannot be found
Come sit awhile with me, my love
Come sit awhile with me
And I will kiss away that frown
Together we shall sit us down
On the dew covered night time grass
Until dread morning comes to pass
Daybreak locates our night time tryst
In each other’s arms we exist
But now I must take you back, my love
But now I must take you back
Visiting time is nearly over
Birdsong will so soon sound
And I must return to a world
Where I cannot be found
Come stay awhile with me, my love
Come stay awhile with me
For I refuse to let you go
Looking at graves row upon row
Though that cold stone may bear my name
Like the love I’ve come to reclaim
Still no allowance will be made
Nor can my debt be left unpaid
But now I must take you back, my love
But now I must take you back
Visiting time is nearly over
Birdsong will so soon sound
And I must return to a world
Where I cannot be found
Come share your world with me, my love
Come share your world with me
I need for you to understand
That we must live in this dark land
Though you puzzle how it can be
That I am back for you to see
If only I could stay longer
And wait for you to be stronger
But now I must take you back, my love
But now I must take you back
Visiting time is nearly over
Birdsong will so soon sound
And I must return to a world
Where I cannot be found
Each night I come to you, my love
Each night I come to you
But find you so profoundly sad
Your sadness drives me nearly mad
In pain I left you on your own
My love could only be on loan
Death dismantled our love so true
By separating me from you
But now I must bid goodbye, my love
But now I must bid goodbye
Visiting time is almost over
Alarms will soon shriek sound
And I must return to my world
But you must not be found
You need to understand, my love
You need to understand
That when I came into your mind
I left my dreadful world behind
But I can tell just one thing more
I entered silent through a door
Confusing as this no doubt seems
It was the door left open by your dreams!
Comments
jolono | February 1, 2012 - 13:45
Moya, I found myself not just reading this but "singing" along with it. There was a tune in my mind and it seemed to fit perfectly.
Nice content about a loved one coming back during the hours of darkness.
Well written and some really nice lines in this.
Silver Spun Sand | February 1, 2012 - 16:15
I agree, wholeheartedly with jolono, Moya. It is kind of like a hymn, or indeed a prayer set to music.
Beautiful.
Tina
Denzella | February 1, 2012 - 16:35
Wowzers! Jolono,
I was scared stiff putting this one up although I have been working on it for a while.
But there are real poets on this site. Moreover,I'm pleased and surprised by your comment that it seemed almost musical because I sure don't have an ear for metre. The best I can do is count syllables.
Thanks for reading and commenting on it though!
Moya
Denzella | February 1, 2012 - 16:45
Again,Wowzers! SSS
Tina,
I'm so pleased by your comment that I am sitting here with a huge grin on my face! I was truly worried about putting it up and when I saw there were comments I almost shut my computer down.
Thank you for reading and commenting.
Moya
gerardineanne | February 1, 2012 - 16:50
Beautifully done.
Like a prayer as others have said
Love the repetition.
And the story:poignant and sad.
Denzella | February 1, 2012 - 17:20
Hello gerardineanne,
Thank you so much for reading and commenting on my poem. Maybe I'm getting it...who knows?
Next, I'll be calling myself a poet! I don't think so!
But thank you I really appreciate your support.
Moya
sue dinum | February 8, 2012 - 19:27
Hi Moya, I loved this, very moving and poignant. The ‘Open Door’ metaphor was excellent, and the refrain that linked it all together...
But now I must take you back, my love
But now I must take you back
Visiting time is nearly over
Birdsong will so soon sound
And I must return to a world
Where I cannot be found
...gave it cohesion and resonance.
Well done!
By the way, your comment about counting syllables is the way I do it too. Thumbs up for that!
sue
Denzella | February 8, 2012 - 20:21
Hello Sue,
Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem.
I must admit I like this one but was not sure how it would be received.
As for counting syllables, my love
As for counting syllables,
Well you taught me that, my love
Well you taught me that.
So thanks very much, Sue.
Much appreciated.
Moya