A naked woman at my door?
Could this be real, could I be sure?
Standing there all covered in paint
Vinyl Matt I think, how very quaint.
A big green budgie on her head
Just laying there, I think its dead
She's talking now, i think its spanish
Won't close my eyes in case she'll vanish
Her pubic hair is blue and curly
A full grown woman, not just a girlie
Her arms stretched out to welcome me
To heal my pain and set me free
Her lips are cute and pouting now
And behind her bum a lovely tail
Strange red eyes all shining brightly
Is this a vision from the almighty?
Sent down to me from up above
Some kind of catholic mother god?
Is this a warning, I must stop drinking
It's certainly a cause for thinking
Maybe its time to give it up
But first just have one more small cup
A wee small dram all dark and dandy
This really is fantastic brandy!