The church was the first to go as Death roared past, wrapped in a whirlwind of dust and flame. One minute it was there, silhouetted against the dying light, the next it was flying splinters, its huge iron cross hurtling down the street to bury itself in the brothel wall. The rest of the town was blasted asunder as he bore down on me in fury, but I met that onslaught with icy calm and the ground shook as his blow fell aside.
Then we were locked in a desperate struggle, each one seeking the other’s weakness. Sweeping across the plains, we collided with the mountain peaks beyond, tearing out landslides, cracking glaciers, ripping up forests until we tumbled down again into strange, twisted deserts.
He stood above me in the moonlight and I shook my head, exhausted, waiting for the end. But then with a sound like falling sand, I found myself surrounded by the ghosts that had gathered in my wake, all those he had snatched before their time. He did not stand a chance.
His pale horse bowed its head as I mounted. Wrapping the storm around me, I rode off into the darkness, trailing Hell behind.
Comments
rjnewlyn | March 31, 2010 - 23:26
Final instalment next week!
Silver Spun Sand | March 31, 2010 - 23:52
"...with a sound like falling sand."
How can this fail, after such imagery?
"Wrapping the storm around me..." again, excellent stuff.
Sorry, but you can't end it next week - please;-)
Tina
Averick | April 1, 2010 - 00:36
Great imagery. I agree--even though I've just started reading it and I'm new--don't end it!
Beeme | April 1, 2010 - 08:42
Lovely, I have been looking forward to this, you never fail to impress.
Love these lines;
"He stood above me in the moonlight and I shook my head, exhausted, waiting for the end"
"Then we were locked in a desperate struggle, each one seeking the other’s weakness."
Sad this is finishing next week, wish it could go on for longer, however am aware that it might be hard to keep writing in this form, which you appear to have mastered.
Beeme xx
Beeme | April 1, 2010 - 14:59
Sorry posted the same comment three times! ;-)
Beeme | April 1, 2010 - 14:59
:-D
insertponceyfre... | April 1, 2010 - 19:07
I can actually see every bit of this as I read it - it's very very good! what are you going to do next - when this has finished?
rjnewlyn | April 1, 2010 - 23:54
Thanks Tina. I'm sorry, but the circle is closing and one can't fight against these things! I guess it comes down to a choice between a story and a soap (it would be quite fun to attempt the latter at some point but I don't feel up to it at the moment).
rjnewlyn | April 1, 2010 - 23:56
Thanks so much Beeme. I wouldn't say 'mastered' at all - I'd like to have another go in the future and try to do something better. It would probably involve actually planning further ahead than the next week ...
rjnewlyn | April 1, 2010 - 23:59
Thanks very much Averick - I'm glad you've found it amongst everything else. Part of me wishes I didn't have to end it but it seems to be heading that way.
rjnewlyn | April 2, 2010 - 00:01
Thanks as always 'insert'. To be honest, I've no idea what next, except to keep to the weekly rhythm and a few free-standing ideas that have accumulated over the course of this one. I wish I could think ahead further than 1-2 weeks - life would be simpler...
rjnewlyn | April 2, 2010 - 17:20
And thanks for the cherry - means a lot as I'm aware this sort of thing isn't everyone's cup of tea.