"IT"S A FUNNY LIFE"

Humorous comments on funny or annoying situations.

MY LIVING ROOM - THE TRUTH.

It's chaos in here - Absolutely the ultimate in dumping grounds; A hoarder's paradise, Where things fall off and topple As they landslide over each other; Boxes tip up anyway they can,

"PLENTY OF SUNSHINE FROM THE WORD "GO" "

I deplore weather forecasts full of the 'Blue Sky Obsession', - using cliches like 'from the word 'Go', and assuming everyone wants heatwaves.

CHERRYGRIPE

Do cherries only grow on trees? I'd like to know. Are they the food of poets When they are won? Not enough are given here To please all writers of fair words.

THE GARDEN PEST

I've bought myself a barbecue With charcoal that you light; I'm going to stink my neighbours out On every summer's night. I'm going to turn the gardens blue With choking greasy smoke,

SCIENCE FICTION CRAZY

I wrote this after attending a few Sci-Fi conventions.

SAUSAGE DOG

I wrote this after seeing a video clip on a TV programme - it's all absolutely true. Names are fictitious, of course.

IF YOUR FACE FITS .........

Just 'who you know' to open doors - - - It's a Face-fit' thing, you see.

SOD'S LAW

Are things ever pre-ordained? After all, Who writes the script for all this misery - The spannered works, the thwarted plans, The big day when it rained?

FYVIE MacSPORRAN

Fyvie MacSporran is a mean old sod, And a tight old fist is he: He has a nasty, mean little purse Where many a moth will be. He never will scrape any new coins out,