Unordered Tales

Ewe Who "Yoo Hoo" a Good (Hidin') Heidi

Lamb (to the slaughter (murders)) this tune at : http://www.somethingstupid.plus.com/trueewewhoo.html On-the-button mutton, off-the-shoulder (of) lamb, Mountain Mouton - the Singing Sheep - bleats 'n' repeats a plaintive plea, unaccompanied, to the tune used as the theme to 1978's television classic "Heidi".

Al(leaf)lit(t)eration

Lyrics to Alan Parker's "My World" television theme tune.

Barnacles, Tentacles, Coracles, Oracles

If I c'd tell you about the b a r n a c l e s, I don't know if you'd believe it. Bare-knuckles 'n' fisticuffs'd be the stuff o' the toughly disputed, the roughly reputed. To a pewter tutor, each a drunkard with a tankard - no long walk spoiled in the park o' the plank'd cure.

Bitter Man's Vitamins

30 December 2003 Bitter Man's Vitamins ----------------------- He’s fit as a fiddle He’s fit as a flea He’s 85,000 times fitter than me He knows every muscle Each vein and corpuscle

From Perky Turkey to Stricken Chicken

I've cut my losses but I've not cut loose I burnt my bridges when I cooked my goose It seems there's nothing that I can produce To burden Pardon with my

Leicester Limerick

There once was a car-thief from Leicester Who stole, on parole, a Fiesta If you're going to steal Stay AWAKE at the wheel Don't fall prey to impromptu siesta

Well my name is not important...

Well my name is not important And it isn't that you oughtn't Take me Down to town to drown This misery But my coat has many pockets Cluttered up with rubbished dockets Gets me Down

Kit Cat Kid

Nursie says today I am to have an early bath She's drawn it up and filled it full before a blazing hearth I do not care for being clean I do not wish to wash There is no need to primp and preen