21 Year old dies of Cirrhosis

I think you're right. Until we, as individuals and as a society, realise the miasma of spiritual emptiness this culture perpetuates (exhibitionism, consumerism, everything too fast and un-thought-out, all 'out there' and nothing 'in here'), more and more people will self-medicate; this doesn't just mean drinking into a stupor, but all sorts of self-medications, including Internet addiction! It's very, very sad.

The individual case is very sad. It doesn't tell us anything about wider society, though. I personally strongly dislike current trends, for example, towards increasing acceptably of public drinking in non-social settings (on buses, the tube etc.) but the British relationship with unpleasant levels of heavy drinking has been around for hundreds of years. Back in the days when virtually everyone when to church, a huge proportion of working age males lived in what would now be considered a virtually permanent state of drunkeness.

A few weeks ago I went to a neighbours party and during the course of the evening (approx 2am) I was introduced to "The Booze Cruiser"! A van not disimilar to an ice cream van, except it was shifting bottles of WKD to 16 year olds. Un-fooking-believable. Parked-up in a quiet side street. I was like, "WTF is that!?" "'S booze cruiser! Got any crack?" booze cruiser. o-f**king-dear. :-0 When the power of love overcomes the love of power, we'll find peace. - Jimi Hendrix

I think jude's right. Whether we like it or not, getting bladdered is seen as a rite of passage in our society and I was in there with the best of them in my youth. But I think we started the process at a later age, and most of us had to learn to like alcohol because it wasn't presented as a kid's fizzy drink. And it wasn't as socially acceptable to wander around town centres waving bottles in everyone's faces. However it was considered more acceptable for a man to beat his wife while drunk, we accepted drink driving, and 'liquid lunches' were an accepted part of corporate life. I don't know that things get worse, they just get different. But I do think that the marketing of alcohol as kid's fizzy drinks is abominable, and should be banned.

I think there needs to be some distinction, however, in the reasons why people drink. Some drink heavily because it's part of 'social belonging', but they lack the inner strength to keep it under control. Yobbery and bottles-in-yer-face falls mainly in this category: socially condoned (and reinforced) overindulgence. Some drink heavily as a form of self-medication against painful memories or insights, and I would venture to bet that many down-and-outs on the street fall here. Some drink heavily because they're basically bored. This is what I mean by spiritual morass: something to do to fill the hole. We have had drunkards since the discovery of beer, yes, and have probably always drunk for the same varying reasons. Where did this 21-year old fall, I wonder? It appears a combination of social approval and boredom. I drank heavily (for me) for a VERY short time when I was about 17, basically out of boredom: small town, small-minded people, small prospects for success. Luckily I saw where it was headed and quit outright. My body is my temple, etc., but not everyone can do this, or so easily; I was more fortunate than some people I knew at the time. If my mum had found I was drinking under-aged, she wouldn't have 'felt helpless' like this poor kid's mum did; my mum would've clouted me and hauled me off to detox. And rightly so.

Some drink heavily too because they're genetically predisposed to it. We don't know why this lad drank. I agree - his family and society let him down - but in such extreme cases where the person is so determinedly self-destructive, there sometimes is nothing you can do.

I think you're right about the various reasons for drink, but I have sympathy for the 'helpless' parent. I like to think I've always been a responsible parent, but I've just found out my 19 year old son is 'experimenting' (I hate that word - you're either taking drugs or you're not) with things beyond booze and the odd spliff. He seems to regard this as some sort of rite of passage, and says he would rather do this now, with a group of people he trusts and who care for him and will know what to do if things go wrong, than when he goes away to college next year with a group of strangers. Sadly, he is far too big for me to clout and haul off to detox, though if I could, I would. He's still working, functioning well in society, he's not violent, or more abusive than the average 19 year old. I suspect he is partly doing it because he is bored, so I am hoping it will stop when he has something else to think about at college. I am sick with worry, but I can't stop him going out, and I can't control what he does when he goes. We have talked about it at some length, and apart from threatening him with worse than death if he ever brings any of it near his 12 year old sister, there seems little I can do unless I reach the point where I feel I need to go to the police. I'm not there yet. If, God forbid, anything happened to him, I would probably sound just like that 'helpless' mother.

The Russians lead the world in the International Drinking Championships. I've heard stories about drunkards sleeping on the ice-covered River Volga, and waking in the morning and simply walking home! Now that's drinking! My latest killing is: http://www.bookscape.co.uk/short_stories/human_sacrifice.php

"I think cheap booze might be a factor. Rough white cider seems to be far cheaper than it was 10 years ago and I couldn't believe the price of cheap-brand spirits in my local Iceland recently." This is a massive problem and one the government is in a position to affect directly. Drink that's specifically for alcoholics - White Lightning, Special Brew etc. - is a similar price or in some cases cheaper than bottled water in many London newsagents. That said, though, I don't know whether artificially raising the price of this kind of stuff through tax would help very much. It might just increase the extent to which people need to demean themselves to get their fix.

Yes, you're right, Margarita. The whole 'experimenting' thing raises the hair on the back of my neck when I think about my son getting to that age. I worry less about my daughter, as even at the age of six she is remarkably pragmatic, but I realise this could change. And I can't really say a lot (except "Don't do it!"), as I 'experimented' myself, although infrequently. I never much liked drinking (I still don't), and never had much interest in hard drugs. I took LSD on a number of occasions, but it left me feeling 'dirty' (or poisoned is more like it), so I quit. It is true, there is a possible genetic link, it may have something to do with the brain's wiring, which may be genetic or may simply be the wonder of being an individual human being. But I wonder how much this genetic thing is propounded by the childhood environment.If your mum or dad's an alcoholic, and you witness this from an early age, the likely choices are that you are either going to become one yourself, or be the co-dependent of one. The other very rare option would be to choose to avoid either trap. But for some people the drinking or dependency starts before the awareness does that there are other options, and by then it is late in the day, although never impossible, to change. As to self-destruction, you are spot on. Self-destructive tendencies are deeply embedded somewhere in the psyche (again, from whence does this arise, I wonder?), and I guess that the only way to get the self-destructive person to stop would be to help them find some meaning to their lives beyond annihilation. But people who are hell-bent on killing themselves will find a way to do it, if they mean it, even if it takes them 15 bottles of wine a day to do the trick. I really don't understand this urge, at all. But why, if his mum saw him coming home slurring at the age of 13 and found bottles scattered all over his room, did she not intervene? Why did she let him out of the house? Why didn't she seek help? Why didn't she give him some rules to begin with? I'm sorry, I buy the 'helpless mother' bit only so far. At 19 or 21, no, you don't have much influence, maybe not even at 16. At 13, he was still basically a child, though.

Sorry, double-post. Bloody computer.

Yes not all teen drinkers are necessarily turning into alcoholics.Poison should at least be expensive and hard to get at. Parents need to be parents and set boundaries.They may not be liked for it in the short term which many people find hard.I even think one can suggest house rules to young adults.Where is it OK to treat ones parents house as a hotel and create huge anxiety. Also we (society) need to have rules about acceptable behaviour .Why have we become so wimpy? We need to laud returning soldiers,not only because they have been through horror but because their self discipline,comradeship, and courage are important values and ought to be mentioned. It doesnt surprise me that the dead 21 year old had a helpless Mother.Neither of them were able to stand up to a bully.

I think jude's right - you aren't going to stop addicts (which is what alcoholics are) using their substance of choice by putting the price up, but it may indeed deter those who are not yet addicted. I think it's really interesting why some people drink heavily for a while, then stop with no problem, and others cannot give it up. I suppose we all need a crutch to get us through life. We choose our crutches depending on our personality and our environment, and some of them are more destructive than others. Yes, you should intervene strongly with a 13 year old child, however unpopular it makes you. And I agree that you should set house rules for young adults - which is what I did for my own son, telling him that whatever he was doing outside the house, I would not tolerate him doing it inside it. Of course, as a society, we give our young people mixed messages. When Ozzy Osborne and Keith Richards survive every chemical substance known to humanity and can still (more or less) stand up, they become national institutions. When my son's father tried to lecture him about the error of his ways, the lad pointed out that this was a bit rich coming from a man whose hero is Iggy Pop.