The other funniest joke in the world

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The other funniest joke in the world

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put it in the microwave until its bill withers.

(I really like this one btw! http://www.abctales.com/story/it068/joke-servere-funnyness)

G

What's the difference betyween a weasel and a stoat? One's weasily recognized and the other's stoatly different. Another joke that doesn't work as well written down.
That's good, I must say, but I still think mine's a lot better. Have you read my other joke?

it068

Q: What do you call a fish with three eyes? A: Fiiish. Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Blind ( I did consider a Nay).
TheBigHand5 Whens a door nay a door. When its open

TheBigHand5

Why can't you just comment on the joke that stated all this?

it068

'Why can't you just comment on the joke that stated all this?' Because that is the whole point of a different forum :- Discuss writing from ABCtales.com THIS is a GENERAL discussion forum where people generally discuss whatever they like! We can discuss the joke! If we choose to discuss the joke. I will comment on the joke and say... I haven't read it.
daym!

it068

some dogs are interbred, infact, my sisters dog just had pups and the father is her brother, hahahahhahahahahaha Im fucking crazy man I swear...

Until we feel our thoughts our thinking remains unfelt

Q - What do you call an exploding monkey? A - A Baboom! Q - what's E.T. short for? A. - Because he's got little legs... Those are my favourites of all time
Q. What did the farmer say to the cow on his roof? A. Get down!

 

I don't think that this joke will offend any blondes because its a joke in which the blonde is the clever one: A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vise versa.” Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.00.” This catches the blonde’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question: “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?” The blonde doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. “Okay,” says the lawyer, “your turn”. She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?” The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.00. The blonde says, “Thank you,” and turns back to get some more sleep. The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?” Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.
Family favourite (Visual) 'Which hand is the frog in?

 

it068 well-wisher. That joke is truly worthy of the word: 'sumblime'!! :) I hope I spelled that right

it068

it068 which hand IS the frog in?

it068

err, imagine....a friend raises two clenched fists, asks that question, one hand is bobbing up and down in froggy like rhythm ...it's, um, silly!

 

it068 No, I think that's pretty damn good. I see why it's visual.

it068

Confucious says: "Man who goes camping must beware evil intent."
This is a joke I made up myself. It may be rubbish and a bit too obscene, but here goes. An American on holiday in Germany meets a German man and his wife and he asks "What's your name?". "Becker", replies the man. "Well", says the American, "I really love your country, Becker". Suddenly the German man punches the American in the face. "Why'd you do that for?", asks the American. "My wifes name is Rebecca!", replies the man.
Q: Why did the Norwich City fan buy two tickets for the match? A: Because he also wanted to take his mother, sister and cousin.
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