Trisha Analyzed

"The Directorate of Intelligence told me that I acted too quickly. The Directorate of Intelligence does not control my life. They told me to take care of the "Timothy" problem. I did. Now they tell me that there is an investigation concerning the murder of Timothy Tymers. I told them to clean it up. They told me, in so many words, that it was my "timing" that was to blame. After all that I've done for the CIA, this is what they come up with. They didn't time the "clean up" right."

"Trisha, what are you doing in the CIA?" the analyst asked.

"I'm killing evil men and women."

"And you believe that you are killing in the interest of justice. You kill people who are desperately trying to escape justice... is that right?"

"That is correct," Trisha said matter-of-factly.

"Why not become a lawyer?" The analyst observed her face. It was blank.

"Because I know that they are guilty."

"How do you know that? How do you arrive at knowledge. You say that it is divine revelation... you hear the truth from God, but how can you be sure that it is the truth? How can you be sure that you are hearing the voice of God and not Satan? Trisha, why not use your mind to arrive at truth... use reason."

Trisha whispered something into his ear. It only took a few seconds.

"That hurt me Trish. You think that that's what I am about... some mistake I made years ago. That's so fucking low of you. You could have heard that from someone. I didn't, damn, I didn't tell anyone except God... well, what can I say. It's true, you may really hear the voice of someone who tells you the truth. That is a possibility, but I want you to think about something. Think about how language is expressed in language, and all the different ways that people express the truth. When you as a child had a revelation of an affair that your father was having with a certain woman, you may have simply developed a sensitivity to language. Your father used a loving language and tone toward you when you were about to sleep and you intuited that tone as the tone of love. You heard that same tone, as disguised as it was, from your father when he was speaking to that woman. The tone was latent or disguised but you still heard it, and you concluded that he was having an affair."

"It wasn't my father who was having the affair."

"I'm just giving an example. All I'm saying is that people understand language in very complex ways, and that there is truth in language. Nietzsche said that you could read a philosopher's autobiography in his works. No matter how hard we try, it's hard to hide our experiences from language. Language aims to find the truth in our experiences. Trish, you could simply have an ability to find the truth in language."

"I suppose that there is some truth to what you say, but it's not only in language. It's in the way the person dresses and behaves and their gestures. It's really in the total package of a person. But God really does tell me the truth when he wants me to know it. My observations only confirm the truth of his words. It began when I was very young. I was yelling furiously at myself in front of the mirror, saying anything that came into my mind. I was just so angry at the world. I wanted to kill myself out of anger at this strangely, frustrating world. It was almost as though I were going insane or speaking in tongues. Then, my whole body felt illuminated, completely filled with, and I felt complete pleasure, radiance, and rapture. I felt as though God had entered my womb. That's when I began to hear his voice."

"Trish, it would be better for you to stop believing in God. You have such keen rational abilities that have not been explored."

"Why is it so unbelievable that a being can know the complete truth about us?"