her eyes

By alphadog1

Fri, 03 Feb 2012
  • 606 reads
3 comments
 

Her eyes reflect her gentle beauty
As she sways in sublime sighs.
Her aubern hair ,weak curled, is rolling;
About her glistening pearl like eyes.
Everything about her's golden.
It rests within her very form;
While I sit and stare with wonder;
As she slowly walks along.

Certificate 12

Comments

Submitted by Nolan on
She has dove's eyes &&
 

Submitted by scratch on
That is a bit of sublimity given to us in words alpha. Fourth line from the end, delete "very". Of course only my subjective opinion on your beautiful poem.

 

Submitted by alphadog1 on
Ive kept the first draft... But not sure about the last line.