NOTHING LEFT BUT ME

she always liked to cat around
and do the dirty dog
she bought things from victoria
and frederick's catalog

but i would never see them
when i saw her in the bed
she wore a flannel nightgown
with big curlers on her head

each time i tried to touch her
she would holler, "let me be"
that HO destroyed our HOME
now there is nothing left but ME

i saw her cell phone number
on the tavern's restroom wall
and noticed it was written down
in every separate stall

i wiped the info clean
but i admit i took it hard
that she was advertising
like it was a business card

that's when i knew she knew
a lot of fellows biblically
that HO destroyed our HOME
now there is nothing left but ME

when we were getting hitched
i heard that woman say, "i do"
and now she's doing other guys
while i sit home and stew

she's giving me the finger
not the one that sports the ring
she treats me like a joker
when i used to be the king

her legs she will be parting
just like moses tamed the sea
that HO destroyed our HOME
now there is nothing left but ME