Asking for the bill

I don’t like asking for the bill

sitting at the table with my empty cup

this waitress is an unreturned text message

an email that should have been replied to

 

and I am flashing her my refreshing the inbox glances

trying to make eye contact to say

can I have the bill or get the courage to raise my voice

‘Bill please’ but it’s hard to suddenly become that person.

 

I’m sure life never used to consist

of being constantly ignored like this. A non-wave

by a car you let out of that busy junction.

you’ve been stuck there yourself so many times

 

and you look up to acknowledge a wave that never comes

but then life is full of people not saying thank-you

and you know that email that’s not been replied to

they are online! They retweeted a nice salmon recipe

 

and you were so clear when leaving that voicemail

“I really need to talk to you as soon as you’re free”

but now it’s acceptable to be ignored

like the waitress who is carrying condiments and then

 

Doing something on the till. And then wiping

oblivious to a whole café of people waving

trying to get her attention

or maybe she knows exactly what she’s doing

 

how can you allow people to feel the sick

empty stomach of being ignored but is there anyone alive

who isn’t ignoring someone right now?

we don’t even send emails saying thanks anymore

 

because we all have so much to do

and now I’m putting my coat on overdramatically

but still nothing because the waitress has disappeared

to a little room at the back and in your head you’re saying

 

can I have the bill please can I have the bill please

in the tone of voice you use for the only sentence you know

in a foreign language. Can I have the bill please?

Phone me back when you get a chance

 

please reply to my text message please take  one second

to say thank you for the invitation or for going out of my way

to help you it’s fine

but you need to remember to say thank-you sometimes

 

and yes we should try to be less sensitive but it’s hard

from being tiny we are taught to say thank you and please

by the parents and teachers who had to put up with us

parroting pleases and thank yous until we knew how to mean it

 

but no-one teaches you to text or email a thank-you we are

terrible people when we’re left on our own.

Let’s not treat our friends like another unopened council tax bill

Hidden in the ‘probably deal with this later’ drawer

 

or treat people we love like hitchhikers

on the side of the road think I could do without this guy

my life will be easier to just carry on and the waitress is still

not looking near so you can say can I have the bill please?

 

Can I have the bill please? Excuse me

could I get the bill before gathering your things and leaving

there are some things I am just no good at

and I guess it’s just another time I find it hard to say goodbye.