Julia chapter 9/ 10

Valerie was alone. The house was empty. She watched from the conservatory window as the pink and gold of the dying sun washed the sky with its brilliant light. Lost in its slowly changing glow she failed to hear the kitchen door open and noticeably jumped when a voice spoke.

‘Is something the matter?’ It was Geoffrey.  Never before had she been afraid of her husband at least not genuinely afraid, and it came as a shock to realise that was how she now felt.

‘Er…no…I was just watching the sunset that was all. You’re back early?’

‘My last meeting of the day was cancelled, so I thought I would work from home this evening.’  Valerie watched as Geoffrey took off his coat and hat, and then put his briefcase in the corner of the room.  It was a ritual she had witnessed a thousand times, but that evening everything was different. It was as if she was looking at a stranger.  There was no doubt it was Geoffrey in physique but whoever inhabited that body was no longer a person she knew.  The new person, whoever he was, was a threat and she did not know how to deal with him.

‘What is for dinner?’ he asked gruffly.  Valerie hadn’t given dinner a thought, her clockwork life had been interrupted, the clock had jammed at the time she had read about the man’s body being found on the beach. 

‘Lamb Curry’ she replied.  It had to be Lamb Curry because that was the only frozen meal left, and she didn’t want Geoffrey to think that she had been distracted in case he asked why. 

‘Did you get your train this morning?’ The question did not really interest her but she felt obliged to ask something, she always did when he came home. ‘Had a good day?’ ‘Was the train crowded?’ ‘Did you finish the crossword?’ she had a stock of homecoming questions designed to avoid the initial silence of his return though she wasn’t really sure why.  Perhaps she had been brought up to imagine that was what a good wife did when her husband came home, to show an interest.  Geoffrey grunted.

‘Yes, only just caught it though.  If it hadn’t been for a delay at the Elephant and Castle I would have been waiting around for another hour.’

‘And your paper? Did you find it?’ Her husband looked across the kitchen at her as if he sensed something in her question.  He took a deeper breath than usual and said he had, and then, ‘I’m going to get changed.’   

The ritual was continuing as usual and she found it reassuring.  The less deviation from the norm the less likely Geoffrey was to notice anything.  He would be a quarter of an hour, enough time to defrost the meal in the microwave place it in the oven and pretend it had already been underway. Geoffrey liked curry, which was peculiar because he didn’t like those who had created it.  He called all Indians, Pakistanis, Bangladeshi’s, ‘the corner shop brigade.’ His lack of respect was legendary in their circle of ‘friends.’ She had often thought how well he would have fitted in, in the days of the Raj. 

When he came back down he was dressed casually and in his slippers.  It should have made her think of him as being ‘comfortable’ but it did not.  Hitler and Stalin probably wore slippers, the former made from the skins of Jews and the latter of Cossack hide.  She drew herself in.  Where were these terrible thoughts coming from? She never thought like this! 

‘I saw that husband of Julia’s today’ said Geoffrey as he started the laborious process of making a coffee with the machine.  ‘Michael?’   ‘Yes, if that’s his name.’  ‘Well you know it is’ said Valerie, upset that Geoffrey always pretended he couldn’t remember the names of people he didn’t like.  ‘Well, he wasn’t with Julia’ continued Geoffrey.  ‘What do you mean?’  ‘Just what I say, he wasn’t with Julia.  He’s upgraded, or perhaps I should say downsized.’

‘What on earth do you mean?’ asked Valerie.  ‘He’s got himself a very attractive alternative.  Must be fifteen years younger than him and if I might say she looked besotted with him.’  Valerie, stunned by the news, gripped the work surface. ‘Are you sure?  Are you certain it was Michael?”  ‘I never forget a face, even if I forget their names. No, he’s either playing away from home or he’s ditched that crazy sister of yours. I’m not surprised, I mean how on earth they stayed together that long I can’t think.’  Although she’d known it on a certain level, it was only now Valerie began to experience how utterly heartless and brutal Geoffrey was.  The news was bad enough, but to break it to her in such a way was totally unnecessary.

‘That’s my sister you’re talking about’ she protested.  ‘I know she’s your sister, but you don’t get on, and she’s left you with your mother, so don’t tell me you’re upset.’  ‘Of course I’m upset.  I wouldn’t want anyone to be unhappy.  Julia doesn’t deserve this even if we’ve had our differences.’  ‘Differences? It was bloody world war three the way you were going on about it the other week.  Anyway it’s natural a man would want to go for a younger woman…’  She saw Geoffrey stop himself mid track perhaps realizing that he was saying too much. He continued.  

‘If a relationship fails then why not?’   Valerie’s concern for her sister was overriding any deep consideration of her husband’s words but somewhere in her head she made a note to revisit what he was saying.  ‘You’re really sure it was Michael and they were together?’   ‘Of course I am, I don’t like him but I know what he looks like, and they were definitely together because the chap practically had his hand up her skirt.  They were looking in an estate agents window.’  Valerie felt a pang of sorrow for her sister and anger towards Michael.  She’d known for some time that there were difficulties and some related to Julia’s inability to have children.  Michael had suddenly found the urge to be a father when it was much too late.  Valerie thought they’d come to an amicable agreement about the whole situation but obviously not. Her only thought in that moment was she wanted to get in touch with her sister, to try to offer some comfort.  ‘How long will dinner be?’ 

‘Five minutes’ said Valerie and then ‘I need to make a phone call.’  Geoffrey was settled into his coffee and had opened his briefcase so didn’t seem to hear her words.  The phone didn’t even ring.  Valerie tried again. Still nothing but an ominous burrrr.  She looked up the number of the telephone company and dialed that instead.  A call centre and several frustrating minutes later she discovered the phone had been disconnected.  She looked up Julia’s mobile number and dialed it.  Julia rarely used her mobile except when traveling.  She’d had a crusade about brain tumors when they first came out and remained unsure about their safety.  Valerie couldn’t get through on the mobile either.  She was wondering what to do next when Geoffrey’s voice bellowed from the kitchen.

‘Is this done yet!’ She drew breathe and steeled herself to go back in the kitchen.  Dinner was easier than she thought as a result of Geoffrey reading papers at the same time as he ate.  Under normal circumstances she would have complained about work at the dinner table but tonight she welcomed the distraction. She watched the man she thought she’d known for thirty years as he focused on his work and realized that he’d become an object and not a person.  Like a dog that had snapped once, and would inevitably bite again, she felt the need to keep focused on him.  How was it she knew he’d done some other terrible thing? Once she’d seen the contents of the envelope in Brian’s clothing a door had opened, a door she had refused to acknowledge before.  The security of money, of a good lifestyle, the image of family life with holidays and homes abroad had all smoothed away the reality of the enigma that was her husband.  Had he always been that way?  Was there a time when he’d changed and she hadn’t noticed? Julia’s words began to filter through the doubt.  She’d told Valerie, she’d warned her, she’d been as open as anyone could about Geoffrey, but Valerie, as always, defended him. After all Julia was outspoken about everything, so it was natural for her to be critical of Geoffrey whose politics and beliefs were the exact opposite of hers.  But Julia had told her something else, one day in the garden many years ago, one sunny bright day when Valerie wasn’t really listening Julia had said, ‘I will never agree with Geoffrey’s approach to life, and I’m not saying this because of our differences, but be careful of him Valerie he’s got a side to him you don’t want to see.’ Valerie had chosen to see the remark as jealousy, but in her heart she always knew Julia was not the jealous type. What was it Julia had seen that she had not?

That night turned into the worst one she could remember.  It was their once a week night for sex and despite the years of having accepted the inevitable, this particular evening she found herself terrified of the stranger Geoffrey had become.  He approached the exercise in his predictable manner, a doctor examining a patient with an unknown disease. Then he mounted her and forced home his desire with a series of grunting and chugging noises, whilst she bit on her lip against the pain of his penetration.  Praying for an early ejaculation she was disappointed.  Geoffrey no doubt due to his tiredness and irritability found it difficult to release himself, and she, unable to summon up the usual responses that made him think he was giving her some form of pleasure, had to lay like a penned animal whilst he inseminated her.  It was a brutal assault on the idea of ‘love making’ but Geoffrey noticed nothing.  Not for one moment did he question her silence or her tightness.  Her lack of involvement passed him by as he pushed ahead like some white flabby machine determined to finish what he’d set out to do.  Something died within her, it was trampled upon and she knew it would never revive.  Geoffrey was grinding his shoe into the flower of her body and she could not accept it.  If he didn’t notice her distress when making love then surely he would never notice her in the cold light of day.  She silently wept.  Turned away from each other they might well have been in separate universes.  If only that were true, but they were not.  The morning would come and she would have to make a decision about how to deal with the nightmare in which she had found herself and in this strange place in which she found herself. Where was Julia? 

Chapter   10 The television presenter was standing above the small cove on the Isle of Wight where the body had been found, pointing to the place where it had been discovered.  ‘The autopsy confirmed that the man had been struck on the back of the head before tumbling to his death from the cliff face.  His body had then been taken by the tide and floating in the westerly current had eventually deposited itself amongst the heaps of driftwood, plastic and rope.  He’d lain there for several days before a local man collecting driftwood had discovered it.  The deceased was named as Brian Spenser also known as James Liddel, Brian Morgan, and Brian Hewlett.’

Lucy the Philipino carer turned to look at her charge.  ‘Oh Mrs. It’s a good job you sleeping’ as she turned the television off.  She hurried downstairs picked up the telephone and dialed the number on the pad.  ‘Hello, is that Valerie? It’s Lucy your mother’s carer.’  ‘Hello Lucy, what’s the matter?’

‘Have you seen the local news?’  ‘Well I was just watching it…but we get London…..’  ‘About Mr. Brian.’‘Mr.Brian? What do you mean?’ ‘They find his body and say they think he has been murdered! Your mother she don’t know she asleep when it come on the news.’ ‘Oh God’ sighed Valerie. So it was Brian, and he was murdered!  ‘You got come down here cos she going to go crazy when she find out.’ Lucy was speaking loudly and in a threatened way.

‘Alright Lucy, look, I’ll get down there as soon as I can.  Don’t let her see the television, unplug it and say there’s a problem with the set or something.’  ‘She go crazy when she find out.’ Valerie had no choice now, she had to confront Geoffrey with the news. He was in the living room watching the television himself.  ‘Geoffrey, that was Lucy’  ‘Who?’  ‘Lucy’  ‘Lucy who?’  His reply made Valerie flip.  ‘Oh for God’s sake, Lucy, mother’s carer!’  ‘Oh….’ Geoffrey was immediately disinterested.  ‘They’ve found Brian’s body, and the police say he’s been murdered.’  She watched her husband to gauge his reaction. ‘What are you saying? Are you sure?’ His response was much too smooth, much too knowing. When you hear of the death of anyone, let alone a member of the family, it evokes more than an expression of surprise.

‘I’ve got to get down to the Island before mother finds out.  On top of the disappearance and the other revelations this will be enough to see her to her grave.’ Geoffrey said nothing but appeared to be thinking deeply, his forehead creased as if he were reading a legal document.  

‘I'll drive down and hope to catch the last ferry.’ 

‘Did they say where he was found?’ ‘I didn’t ask Lucy, but wasn’t there something in your paper the other day about a body on the Isle of Wight?’ ‘Was there?’ Geoffrey was a good liar but the problem was Valerie knew her husband always read the Times from cover to cover and had a remarkable memory as commercial lawyers tended to.

‘I thought you mentioned it?’  Geoffrey looked at her with a sharp eye.  She knew he hadn’t told her and he knew that as well.  She’d given him the first indication she realised what was going on. ‘How long will you be down there?’ he asked. ‘God knows.  Certainly until the weekend. Once I get there she never wants me to go.  I’ll just have to tell her about Brian and then make sure Lucy doesn’t pack her bags.’  ‘Why would she do that?’ ‘Because she’s had enough.  The last thing she wants is another problem with mother. She’s difficult as it is.  If Lucy goes then we’re in trouble, we aren’t going to find another live in companion as compliant as she is.’  Valerie waited for the usual quips about Philipino’s but they did not come.  Geoffrey appeared to have other things on his mind.        

Valerie’s night vision was not good.  She’d had corrective eye surgery and it worked perfectly for daytime activity but left her with a certain amount of night blindness.  Under normal circumstances she wouldn’t have even thought of driving down to the Island, but the urgency in Lucy’s voice was enough to overcome her fear.  At least at that time of night the traffic should be light and the motorway clear.  She gathered her clothes, neatly placed them in the leather travel bag together with her bath things and was about to zip up the inner compartment when she had a thought.  Going to the dressing table she removed the envelope. She did not want to leave it in the house, not if she was going to be away. Crossing the room she was about to place it in her bag when he appeared in the doorway.

‘I was thinking, I could come with you.’  Valerie froze, she could see he’d noticed the envelope. She tried to act naturally and continued to put the envelope into her bag as if nothing was the matter. ‘What about work?’ she asked.  She didn’t want Geoffrey with her, he had left his mark on her aching uterus and that was bad enough.

‘I could cancel tomorrow’s meetings.’  Geoffrey’s offer was so far out of character she knew there was something dramatically wrong.  ‘You don’t need to do that Geoffrey, I’ll be alright.  Once I’ve told her what has happened to Brian we’ll have a better idea of what’s involved.  You don’t want to get trapped down there.’  In truth it was Valerie who did not want to get trapped and she would do anything to avoid that happening.  Geoffrey said nothing but looked at her as if assessing her size for a body bag.  His eyes were disconnected, calculating. ‘Well if you’re sure’ he replied. ‘Yes, yes I am. You’ll be alright won’t you. There’s plenty in the fridge and freezer.’ ‘Yes, I’ll be alright.’ He smiled in a non-committal way. Momentarily she felt a sense of relief, but it was too soon.   ‘By the way, what’s in the envelope?’ Standing in the doorway he looked like a bouncer on the doors of a nightclub, he might as well have said ‘empty your pockets.’