bastard Ghalza

By alphadog1

Wed, 20 Aug 2014
  • 707 reads
2 comments
 

Only sinners boldly, enter heaven entirely, for they are truly free;
as only shriving coldly, and golloping hands blindly, do disdain me.

No one else, can ever –alone- melt, the golden shining heathen gates;
As no one else, unless with heavy belts, can collop priests appreciate.

Here the frightful, spear the frigid, while –standing- at the open door;
As the coin,  not yet purloined,  is given –freely-  to the “lowly” poor.

And  the stars, are at the bars, seen slow dancing  in the near dusty  air;
Amid the cans,  and priestly bans,  stoke the soporific  without a  care.

Jesus the hero, amid the zero, welcomes in the bungled and the botched;
amid the groans, from powerful thrones, who always judge and accost.

The man stands, he’s not canned he is the one the only one true alpha
And the dog ends here free from -the- bends of this bastard gahzal

© adh2014 

Certificate 15
Poem

Comments

Submitted by Geoff Smith on

You've got some great phonology going on here. I love the line:

the stars, are at the bars, seen slow dancing  in the near dusty  air

some heavy sibilance, consonance, alliteration going on there!

Thanks for reading. I am grateful for your time.

Submitted by alphadog1 on

Its been a real bastard. (hence the title, which interestingly enough is also a name for a connected  form. It took four hours to construct from ten pages of notes in my notebook. 
in the end, I have to say, that  its not a strict Ghalza  as its trochees  are not precise as is the end rhyme, which should be, in this case, all end with the "ee" sound, in all rhyming couiplets.  But I am pleased with the word play that I archived despite this.
I have been away from "form" for a while: mainly because  it is restrictive,  but, at the same time, I also need to get some practice in. Most of my recent poetic texts, are, in many ways, a reflection of the book I am reading: Joyce's "Ulysses".  well, I struggled reading the bible  for years and that was utterly indecipherable in some places ludicrous  in others. The same  could be said for Joyce's  text, only funnier. I like the way Joyce  writes. he layers his texts  with amazing words, that have entered my vocabulary. like clodding or  walking slowly  Shrive  connected to the priesthood  and codding or ripping someone off.  The dusty Air came  from an article  I read about space  being full of dust: from all the exploding stars.  I might come back to that in another of this series, which, I think deserve  a title... perhaps the Blasphemics?  I don't know. I know its not a word as such, Its my coined phrase, but  it sounds good, and I can imagine a book on a shelf with that title.