Praying to St Lou Reed
By Angusfolklore
- 359 reads
Lou Reed snarls at the opening syllables
of beseechment, the skinny boy's prayer.
Nobody told the boy to beware this saint.
'You only came to me because you know
it won't work,' Lou says. Then adds,
'Everyone else celestial turn you away son?
Well, I ain't no easy touch,
even in the afterlife, kid.
But try again soon.'
At the second prayer, Lou sighs,
but gets caught by the begging eyes.
'Heaven loves a trier, puppy dog, ' he drawls.
'But that ain't me.'
And slams the pearly gates in the upset face.
Later, Lou listens hard to the third prayer,
stares back at the young man with issues
and sucks in his cheeks, unsure
what to make of all this 'blah blah'
when he just needs peace up here.
Patron saint of oddballs, is all he is.
But he decides to melt a little
anyways.
'Go to Times Square at midnight,' he commands,
'and wait for my winking angel there,
the one without wings, the butch one
with the leather coat.
For God's sake don't look him straight
in his queer eye or he'll just fly off.
You'll pay me back before long,
don't worry.'
Lou sees St Peter smirk, then hastily turn.
'Live and sin another day,' Lou snarls.
A group of hipster angels cackle nearby.
Lou kicks a cloud and kisses them goodbye.
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Comments
The mere thought that Lou
The mere thought that Lou Reed might be up in heaven makes me, for the first time in ages, seriously contemplate trying to get there.
Patron Saint of Oddballs. Of course. Although I'd always associated him more with the Roman pantheon, what with the Venus in Furs.
That final verse is an image that will, happily, stay with me for a long time.
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An original take -
An original take - Iconoclastic Saint Lou, and wouldn't be a hoot if he was on duty at the pearly gates?
Dougie Moody
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