The day after God flooded the earth

Days after God had flooded the earth for man's sins,
a man named Jacob emerged from the water,
a pious and religious man,dedicated to the word of god,
he decided that he should not be held accountable,
as he had always followed the word of the almighty.
And so he had built himself a snorkel carved form wood,
for he and his family, but the flood had struck to soon,
and his wife and sons, and his only daughter had been washed away.
God was angry at his disobedience,
and sent a squid to gobble him up.

And so on the Sabbath when Jacob was fishing,
he could afford to be greedy,
as the world was unpopulated and he had not seen another soul for some days.
From the water emerged a squid,
Squiddy Punch!,
and the squid gobbled him up.
When Jacob awoke and found himself inside the squids belly,
he found beside him wedged in the stomach lining of the squid,
a single piece of corn so valuable,
Jacob picked it up and put it into his pocket.
Before he knew it the squid took a deep breath and spat him back out,
covered in grunge and a whole manner of disgusting things,
God said this is a mark for your disobedience.

But Jacob smiled and thought to himself,
now I have enough corn to feed me for the winter.

God was now very angry,
at Jacobs disregard for his punishment,
and so sent a octopus to gobble him up.
From the water emerged a octopus,
Kapow!, Pow!, Pow!,
and the octopus gobbled him up.
When Jacob awoke to find himself inside the octopus's belly,
he found to his astound a table small enough to fit inside,
with a fish sat opposite him and so they proceeded to play poker,
not much of a gambling man to his surprise he won every hand.
Before he knew it the octopus took a deep breath and spat him back out,
covered in a heavy ink stain and a whole manner of disgusting things,
God said this is a mark for your disobedience.

But Jacob smiled and thought to himself,
now I have enough money to last me a lifetime.

God was full of wrath now,
at Jacobs resilience,
and so sent a dolphin to gobble him up.
From the water emerged a dolphin,
Flap Attack!
And the dolphin gobbled him up.
When Jacob awoke to find himself inside the dolphins belly,
he had always been mesmerized by the dolphins song,
and found a intriguing box beside him,with nothing else to do,
he opened it from the box came fourth a musical note engulfing him.
Before he knew it the dolphin took a deep breath and spat him back out,
covered in slime, and a whole manner of disgusting things,
God said this is a mark for your disobedience.

But Jacob smiled and thought to himself,
now I can make sweet music.

God was wild with fury,
at Jacobs non-compliance to his rules,
and sent a camel to gobble him up.
From the desert emerged a camel,
Burp!,Spat!, Attack!,
and the camel gobbled him up.
When Jacob awoke to find himself inside the camels belly,
where he found two humps, reaching inside one he found an endless supply of water,
and put this into his flask.
Before he knew it the camel took a deep breath and spat him back out,
covered in goo, and a whole manner of disgusting things,
God said this is a mark for your disobedience.

But Jacob smiled to himself,
now I have an endless supply of water to last me to the end of my days.

God was overcome with fury and vengeance,
and so sent a whale to gobble him up,
from the ocean emerged a killer whale,
DUN!!! DUN!!! DUN!!!,
and the whale gobbled him up.
When Jacob awoke to find himself in the whales stomach,
to his amaze he found a genie already inside, who offered him three wishes,
for Jacob this was simple he firstly wished for his wife to be alive, then his sons, then his daughter,
and all three wishes gone.
Before he knew it the whale had spat him back out,
covered in muck and a whole matter of disgusting things,
God said this is a mark for your disobedience.

But a sudden feeling of guilt and a sense of admiration,
swept over God,
Jacob had shown to be a good and resourceful man,
and although he had at times been disobedient,
he had realised this had been out of love for his family and all that is good and divine,
and so God forgave mankind for their sins,
and the earth was repopulated,
leaving everyone to live happily ever after.