remember the random acts

you will remember the random acts
of kindness
that have brushed your way,
when your way begins to wind down,
when the body begins to give up,
when exhaustion kicks in---
you will remember the random acts &
wonder why you didn’t do the same---
you’ll remember all the times that you
questioned your own motivations &
went the other way---
you’ll remember that you worried about this
or the other & then
turned away---
you’ll remember that there had been humans
that did more for you
than you have ever done for them &
you will remember that you’d been influenced
by reasons that all added up to
nothing.

it is the kindness that comes without a tag,
it is the kindness that comes without the attempt at
getting a gold star from someone, from something,
from somewhere,
it is Blanche’s
“kindness of strangers,”
which will be remembered
when you lay there on the deathbed---
no, it won’t be the relatives who
long for something after,
be it material, be it an end to the emotional weight that
you seem to have brought them,
be it the look in their faces that spin a thousand
lies,
which do not come with malice but a want to stop
the inevitable---
all that is instant
all that is permanence
coming in slow motion,
all this is expected &
it will not cloud the moments that another human cared for
you,
only for the sake of
doing so.