Artificial Intelligence (Hay Eye)

The two blokes sat on the steps of a disused library. They weren't actually identical twins, but looked it. Both had large stomachs which made incestuous love to their overarching moobs. Heads were inevitably polished bald, and they sported indistinct tattoos, like factory code marks. Crumpled trousers with greasy crutches and half zipped flies completed the ensemble. Except for t-shirts.

Identical in every other way, one shirt was printed with the word 'Hay', and the other with the word 'Eye'.

Yes, autocorrect was still laughable. Fleets of decommissioned self-drive cars told the tale.

"Well" said one of the blokes "You only know me as an international troubleshooter, but there's more to me than meets the I".

"Is there?"

"Yes, indeed. I'm a man of many secrets. For example, I never talk about the war." (Rubbing left little finger in a gingerly fashion, face contorted in excruciating pain).

"Oh".

"But I want you to know that confidential papers have been lodged with the Bank of Moldova which, on my death, will astound the world and make you a very rich man!"

"But we're not men, we're AI robots!"

"That's a point....but who said computers could never have imagination!"

"Or a sense of humour!"

"Ha ha" they chortled.

Gud by...