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1821

"I've decided what I'll do be doing" said Maud, who'd spent twenty-five years in the same village.

"Well, what will you do be doing?" said Flo, who'd also spent twenty-five years in the same village.

"I'm going on one of them there holidays!"

"But it's July. Why collect holly this month?"

" Ah! Queen know-nowt. It means I'm going away."

"Going away! That's imporridgable, that is"

No, but it means I have to hire a horse and trap, take the coach tut big city, sail across mighty seas, puke a lot, listen to crap singing, worship the Captain, and pay all my life savings."

"You'd best not go then."

"Aye....Maybe not."

2021

"So.I'm going on holiday at last, Kylie! said Mandy, who'd spent twenty-five months in the same room.

"You never are! How did you manage that?" said Kylie who'd also spent twenty-five months in the same room.

"So, you start with two or three jabs and then take out special insurance, give all your details to that track and Tracey person, take a couple of tests, buy a new briefcase for all the documents, budget for quarantine hotels and be prepared for last minute cancellations."

"Do you have to do that new test with candy floss up your bum? If it turns brown, there's something and nothing wrong with you."

"So.Probably."

"Best not bother then."

"Well....maybe not".