Scriptwriting

If you're writing a farce,
Always mention an arse.
You'll need a posh lady too.

"The salt, please parse".
Her husband may say.
"Of course" she will answer, "yarse, yarse".

"There's no bloody red sarse".
A northerner could then remark.
All the rules of convention, just a lark.
Wherein, I suppose, lies the farce....